IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

International travel is becoming cheaper and countries are opening their doors to more and more tourist. Do the advantages of increased tourists outweigh disadvantages.

#travel #countries #doors #tourist #tourists
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In the modern
world
Use synonyms
, travelling overseas can be achieved easily. And most
countries
Use synonyms
 are welcoming more
tourists
Use synonyms
 to visit their
countries
Use synonyms
. From a personal point of view, it's necessary to encourage more
tourists
Use synonyms
 to travel around the
world
Use synonyms
.
First,
Linking Words
the benefit is more travellers could boom the economy of the travelling country.
For example
Linking Words
, if
countries
Use synonyms
 would like to attract more
tourists
Use synonyms
. The
countries
Use synonyms
 need to pay more attention to the hospitality industry. It will lead to more businesses contributing businesses to building more hotels and restaurants. So there will be more working opportunities and workplaces for citizens. It's good for developing the economy fast.
Besides
Linking Words
, if more
tourists
Use synonyms
 visit different
countries
Use synonyms
, they could realize more different cultures. It's good for cultural diversity and keeps the original
culture
Use synonyms
. As we know,
culture
Use synonyms
 is a soft ability
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 a country. If more visitors could express the country's
culture
Use synonyms
 to the
world
Use synonyms
, let more foreigns understand the
culture
Use synonyms
, which could reduce the threat of war.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are
also
Linking Words
 some disadvantages.
For instance
Linking Words
, more travelling will increase some environmental problems.
Such
Linking Words
 as, air pollution will be increased. But new technology could address
this
Linking Words
 issue. Nowadays, there
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 electric cars to improve
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
air pollution. We could believe that there will be a new source-type aeroplane and train
instead
Linking Words
 of the original one in the future. In conclusion, the benefit of global travelling could improve economic development and keep cultural diversity. So
countries
Use synonyms
 should encourage more guests to travel over the
world
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by zooeyyu on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: