the table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbishetd. the charts show the result od surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with visit, during the same two period.

the table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbishetd. the charts show the result od surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with visit, during the same two period.
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The picture shows a table of the number of
visitors
Use synonyms
to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished,
while
Linking Words
the pie charts illustrate the result of surveys asking
visitors
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how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same two periods.
Overall
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, it seems that most of the results of surveys of
visitors
Use synonyms
represent people are more satisfied after refurbishment rather than before.
According to
Linking Words
the table number of
visitors
Use synonyms
get raised by about 2000 more than past in Ashdown Museum
while
Linking Words
the share of
visitors
Use synonyms
who were dissatisfied and very dissatisfied became less. The before refurbishment pie chart demonstrates that a large part of the chart belonged to dissatisfied and very dissatisfied people with half of the pie.
However
Linking Words
, there were many satisfied and very satisfied
visitors
Use synonyms
with only a five
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
lower share than opponent groups. It should be considered that after refurbishing positive opinions about the museum get raised 30% more than before implementation,
while
Linking Words
the number of negative opinions decreased by 30%. There was a group of people who didn’t have any response to the survey and, they remained at 5% after and before the implementation.
Submitted by shojaeinejad_m on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 77%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words visitors with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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