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Band 7

Some parents spend little free time with their children today. Why is this? Who do you think this affects more, parents or children?

#parents #time #children
These days, more and more families are not spending much
time
 with their babies or they spend fewer moments with them and that can negatively affect them.
This
 essay will discuss the reasons why few
parents
 are not spending much
time
 with their youngsters, and it will state which side between the child or
parents
 is affected by
this
.
Although
 many
parents
 are not spending
time
 with their
kids
 both
parents
 are required to work to be able to provide a good life for their children.
As a result
 that the
parents
 are working more
time
 than staying at home and providing the kid with the care that they need. As an example of that, the father is working until night and not being with his kid to provide him with the
time
 and guidance that needed. In terms of the second question who will be affected by that behaviour, the
kids
 are being affected more because it is a sensitive period for them.
However
, there are many
parents
 are not seeing that staying with their
kids
 is affecting them and especially in schools. Particularly, the children in the early stages need to be followed by their
parents
 and be feel kind and warm by them.
For instance
,
kids
 are comparing themselves to other
kids
' families, how they are treating them, and spending
time
 with them. In conclusion,
Parents
 are not focusing on their
kids
 and focusing more on their careers to provide the
kids
 with a better life but they sacrifice that with the
time
 that
kids
 needed and
that is
 affecting the children and making them feel less warm from
parents
.
Submitted by youseof on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Parental involvement
  • Work-life balance
  • Screen time
  • Societal norms
  • Neglect
  • Guilt
  • Milestones
  • Family bonding
  • Quality time
  • Effective parenting
  • Familial connections
  • Dedicated family time
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