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Band 5

Teachers used to convey information but now with wide resources of information Some people think that there is no role for teachers to play in modern education others disagree Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Introduction
There are controversial perspectives heating a debate over the
teachers
Use synonyms
’ influence in the educational environment with the development of technologies.
While
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 some
people
Use synonyms
 hold a strong view that lecturers can not act as a precursor to advanced schooling, the opposite
makes
Correct subject-verb agreement
make
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 a statement of disagreement. In my opinion, I would contend that
people
Use synonyms
’s information achievement is facilitated by technological machines
but
Punctuation problem
, but
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 the role of
teachers
Use synonyms
 is still important in education.
Body paragraph 1
Without a shadow of a doubt,
technology
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 brings about an enormous impact on
people
Use synonyms
’s
lessons
Check wording
learning
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, but it cannot overshadow the importance of professors.
People
Use synonyms
 can find a wealth of precious knowledge quickly on the internet.
For instance
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, a flood of websites, namely Google, Safari, Firefox ,and so on, provide
people
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 with a lot of valuable information and even theoretical knowledge for study conveniently without taking much time.
Thus
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,
technology
Use synonyms
 does wonders for
people
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 to research and learn lessons.
Body paragraph 2
While
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 the tremendous effect of information
technology
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 is widely acknowledged, that of
teachers
Use synonyms
’
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apply
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 is
also
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 significant. The lecturers can give
people
Use synonyms
 a great deal of useful advice and a set of
skills
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 that can help
people
Use synonyms
 to be well-prepared for their career path .
For example
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,
people
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 are given a set of
skills
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such
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 as time management, communication
skills
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 and life
skills
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, to name a few
by
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, by
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 their
teachers
Use synonyms
, which can make
people
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 better and help
people
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 establish their firm in the future.
Hence
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, the
teachers
Use synonyms
 stand
people
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 in good stead in education and else
thing
Fix the agreement mistake
things
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.
Conclusion
In conclusion,
technology
Use synonyms
 plays a good role in
people
Use synonyms
’s education
but
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, but
show examples
teachers
Use synonyms
 still have their own fundamentals.

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Task Achievement
Make sure to clearly state your opinion in the introduction and conclusion.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try to connect your ideas better with linking words like 'firstly', 'secondly', and 'finally'.
Task Achievement
Use more specific examples to support your points about the role of teachers.
Task Achievement
You presented both sides of the argument, which is good for discussion essays.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your writing shows good understanding of the topic.
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