Some people think that only the goverment can make significant changes in society while others think that individuals can have a lot of influence. What is your opinion?

#people #goverment #changes #society #individuals #influence

Nowadays, it is commonly believed that only the

government

can make global changes in society,

while

some people think that each person can make a huge impact

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show examples

our world. Personally, I would say that rules written by the

government

are more valuable than actions made by individuals.

This

essay will discuss both of these thoughts and include some examples. On the one hand, the

government

creates laws to make people's lives better. Most of the laws were aimed to increase the wealth and level of happiness of each resident in a country.

Furthermore

, the

government

is a controlling institution which able to predict and tackle problems in society.

For instance

, the New Zealand

government

published a law that forbids selling cigarettes to customers who were born after 2013.

This

decision completely change

situation

Add an article

the situation

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with young smokers and whole health issues caused by cigarettes.

On the other hand

, individuals think only about their own profit and sometimes forget about others.

Huge

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A huge

The huge

show examples

number of people are following celebrities and don't have personal opinions about some aspects of life and just replicate

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the behavior

show examples

behavior

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behaviour

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and civil position of

Correct pronoun usage

their favorite

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favorite

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favourite

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influencers.

For example

, Elon Musk`s fan base has wrong imaginations about

history

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the history

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and even

Ukrainian-Russian

Correct article usage

the Ukrainian-Russian

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war because of

incorrect

Correct article usage

the incorrect

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political views of

well-known

Correct article usage

the well-known

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and rich individual Elon Musk.

To sum up

, I would say that I completely share the opinion that governments make more influence than a single person.

Also

, in my

opinion

Add a comma

,opinion

show examples

acts made by the

government

are more useful and were made with good intentions.

Submitted by yarmola.vlad on Thu Mar 16 2023

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

253 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The tradition that family gets together to eat meals is disappearing. What are the reasons? What are the impacts on families and societies?

The media is increasing interest in famous people who have ordinary backgrounds. Why do you think people are interested in the lives of famous people? Do you think this is a good thing?

The first graph displays which electrical appliances are owned the most of a household, while, the others illustrates how many hours of housework were consumed per week in one country from 1920 to 2019.