The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane
The diagram depicts the manufacturing process of making
sugar
.
Use synonyms
Overall
,It is a linear process and itLinking Words
is consists
of seven stages beginning with growing and Change the verb form
consists
end
up with drying and cooling.
In the first stage, Wrong verb form
ending
Sugar
cane is growing Use synonyms
almost
12-18 months after that it is harvested and after Change preposition
for almost
that
it is carried to a truck as a raw material.Add a comma
,that
Then
,It is crushed for taking juice .After collecting juice it is Linking Words
then
carried to a limestone filter for Linking Words
purify
.Next,The juice Replace the word
purification
undergo
through Evaporator to form Change the verb form
undergoes
syrup
.Add an article
a syrup
Then
,It is carried to a centrifuge for Linking Words
seperation
Correct your spelling
separation
separating
Use synonyms
sugar
from syrup.Change preposition
of sugar
Finally
,Linking Words
sugar
goes through Use synonyms
drying
and cooling pot where Correct article usage
a drying
sugar
is ready for packaging.Use synonyms
Submitted by englishpills077 on
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words sugar with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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