IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some countries have come up with law to restrict the working hours of an employee. What is the reason for this ? Is that positive or negative ?

#countries #law #hours #employee #reason
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some nations have come up with the
idea
 that the working
hours
 of employees should be limited. I strongly hold the view that
this
 notion has a positive effect
due to
 boosting workers' performance and decreasing societies’ costs.
To begin
 with, improving employees' function the restriction of their working
hours
 is a vital act.
In other words
, when people
work
 for a long
time
 their passion will have been faced significantly fall
therefore
, they are not able to
work
 well so it is important to have a specific scheme for them.
Moreover
, people’s minds cannot be creative all the
time
 so when working for a long length after several
hours
 their mind going to shut down and they lost their focus.
In addition
 to improving employees’ function, decreasing society’s cost is irrefutable because when we set a specific
time
 for them to
work
 we do not need to pay them more money and
this
idea
 not only helps us to manage our costs but
also
 helps people to a plan for their life.
For example
, I remember when the company that I am currently working for it decided to reduce our working
time
 it was two edge sword because on the one hand, I was going to have more
time
 in my own life and
on the other hand
, they saving more money for themselves.
Although
 there are some who may claim that
this
Idea
 has a negative effect on society’s life
furthermore
, they say the labours must
work
 as much as they can to be useful to their corporation, but
this
 view cannot be overlooked because the
idea
 that they claim is far of the human mind it is not right to do with folks. in conclusion, some states, argue that it is right to limit workers' working
hours
 is beneficial
while
 others have the opposite view they believe that companies should use their human resources as much as possible.
Submitted by mahdiniknejad on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: