Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There are lots of poorer
countries
who
needs
Change the verb form
need
show examples
help
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
financial aid from some rich
countries
, but
this
doesn't seem to be useful anymore,
instead
of giving
money
, these rich
countries
should give supplier to help them
wiht
Correct your spelling
with
better life. In
this
essay, I will explain why developed
countries
should give
this
help. First of all ,I believe that
money
just can’t resolve any problem,even tho it looks very generous
giving
Change the verb form
to give
show examples
these poorer
countires
Correct your spelling
countries
huges financial
helps
Change the wording
help
bits of help
show examples
,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
eventually
Add a comma
,eventually
show examples
these
Change the determiner
this money
show examples
money
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
show examples
to return it back.
For example
, a Europe country, Greece,
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
broke in
few
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a few
show examples
years ago because of
owing
Wrong verb form
owed
show examples
money
.
Secondly
, practical methods
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
more useful than giving
money
, we all know
money
isn't the only
way
to solve
this
issue .
Instead
, these rich
countries
should give them food or some supplies, in most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Add an article
the pooer
show examples
pooer
Correct your spelling
poor
show examples
countries
, what they need the most are daily necessities,
this
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
not only can help them to have a better life,
also
this
way
doesn't really
costs
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cost
show examples
that much. It can make those rich
countries
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
good
reputaion
Correct your spelling
reputation
by helping them. In summary , rich nations are not able to solve poverty issues in the poor ones by giving
money
. Lots of people often argue that
financial
Replace the word
finances
show examples
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
the only good
way
to help poor
countries
. In my opinion, giving practical
stuffs
Change the wording
stuff
kinds of stuff
pieces of stuff
show examples
is
helpful
Correct quantifier usage
more helpful
show examples
than giving
money
. Only in that
way
Add a comma
,way
show examples
many
countries
would stop struggling with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
poverty. Because our main target is to help them, not to give them more and more loans which they would have to pay.
Submitted by yiinn317 on

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • poverty alleviation
  • economic inequality
  • developing nations
  • foreign aid
  • sustainable growth
  • technical assistance
  • expertise
  • infrastructure
  • education
  • fair trade
  • trade barriers
  • sustainable development
  • environmental conservation
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