We can not help everyone in the world that needs help, so we should only be concerned with our own communities and countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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It has long been a topic of numerous debates that if people are not able to help poor men all over the world, they should just be worried about their own country.

While

Linking Words

I agree that we can not be

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a helper

the helper

show examples

helper

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helpers

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for all mankind, I believe that we have to

concern

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be concern

show examples

about global problems and take action if it is needed. In

this

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essay

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,essay

show examples

I will shed light on both aspects. On the one hand, we can not be

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a helper

the helper

show examples

helper

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helpers

show examples

for everyone. Our first

responsibilities

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responsibility

show examples

in our life

Change the verb form

are

show examples

being

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a provider

the provider

show examples

provider

Fix the agreement mistake

providers

show examples

for

own

Correct pronoun usage

our own

show examples

family

Fix the agreement mistake

families

show examples

and children. To elaborate, if a father can not be his own

kids

Change to a genitive case

kid's

kids'

show examples

bread winner

Correct your spelling

breadwinner

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, it comes unacceptable to become another

one

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

kids

Change noun form

kids'

kid's

show examples

provider.

In addition

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, after concerning about our own family, it is valuable to be concerned about our

neigbors

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neighbours

and relatives.

Forxample

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For example

, I personally would prefer to help my

cousins

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cousin

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if she needed

rather

Correct pronoun usage

me rather

show examples

than another one’s cousins but if I can help them both I absolutely by all

mean

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means

show examples

would do my best and it would be my pleasure. But perhaps, it is hard and almost impossible to help everyone in the world.

On the other hand

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, I strongly disagree with not caring about others

countries

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countries'

country's

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issues. In fact, humanity always comes beside kindness. People should always provide mutual support for their same kind no matter what and be always

their

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there

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with their helping hand. Kindness and donation are the greatest value of man

being

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

More over

Correct your spelling

Moreover

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now days

Correct the word

nowadays

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global village we are now like a family and as we care about our own folk we should do the same with our same kind.

thus

Linking Words

, we should not only be concerned about

out

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our

show examples

community. The main conclusion

can

Correct pronoun usage

that can

show examples

darwn

Correct your spelling

drawn

from

this

Linking Words

essay is,

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however

Add the comma(s)

,however

show examples

I admit that we can not help everyone, I still believe should notice other countries as well.

Submitted by adelkhoosogol on Sat Mar 18 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
30
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

310 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

global interconnectivity
international cooperation
ethics
moral obligation
geographical borders
diplomatic relations
economic stability
global security
resource allocation
expertise
international aid
dependency and development
sustainable solutions
local and global initiatives
community resilience

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We can not help everyone in the world that needs help, so we should only be concerned with our own communities and countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Fully explain your ideas

Write a letter to your favourite restaurant. Include the following: · Your reason for writing · What you like about the restaurant · Suggestions for improvement

some people said professionals such as doctors or engineers should be required to work in the country where they did their training while other said they should be free to work in another country

Historical monuments and museums are visited only by the tourists, locals do not visit them. Why is this is happening? What are the solutions to prevent this?