IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Nowaddays jeans are considered to be the most popular type of clothes in USA. Many people wear jeans every day. What part does this type of garment play in American culture?

#nowaddays #jeans #type #clothes #usa #people #part #garment #american #culture
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
This
chart
 shows the changes in the cost of visiting a national
park
 in the country from 2011 to 2018
as well as
 the
number
 of
visitors
 to national
parks
 each year. It is evident from the
chart
 that the cost to visit the
park
 in 2011 started at 8$ and in 2014 the
ticket
price
 has risen again to 10$.
However
, the
price
 is not the highest on
this
 graph. In 2015, the biggest increase in
this
chart
 was 15$, but in 2016 the
ticket
price
 dropped to 10$, the same as in 2014, and in 2017 the
price
 gradually increased from 12$ to 15$ in 2018 and equal to 2015. From the
chart
 in 2011, it can be seen that the
number
 of
people
 visiting national
parks
 was almost 0.3
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
. From 2012 to 2014, the
number
 of
visitors
 to national
parks
 began to increase gradually from 0.35
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 to 0.43
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
. The
Visitors
Correct quantifier usage
number of Visitors
show examples
 to National
Parks
 began to decline to 0.40 million as National
park
 tickets in 2015 became more expensive than ever, leading to 2016-2017 peaking in the
number
 of national
park
visitors
 and the highest
chart
 is 0.52-0.53
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
people
, because in 2016-2017, the
price
 of tickets for visiting the national
park
 has been adjusted, and in 2018,
people
 visiting the national
park
 decreased from 2017 to 0.8 million
people
due to
 the
price
 of the national
park
 entrance
ticket
 being adjusted highest again.
Overall
, most
people
 will only go crazy for
parks
 when
park
ticket
 prices drop even more because tickets to the national
parks
 are cheaper than in 2015 and 2018.
Submitted by Patlada.chum on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: