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Band 5.5

Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however believe that school is the best place to.

#people #parents #children #members #society #school #place
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There are individuals who believe
that is
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 the duty of
parents
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 to teach their young
ones
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 to be good citizens.
Although
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, there are humans who totally oppose
this
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 concept they claim that the schools are responsible for moulding a child's
character
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. In
this
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 essay, I will go through both sides of the argument and will extend my support for the former view.
Firstly
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, there is no doubt that
children
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 used to spend most of their valuable time in school. The authorities should make sure to organise motivational sessions which play a major role in
character
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 modulation.
Moreover
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, they should
also
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 encourage subjects like Life skills which will help young
ones
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 to be better citizens.
However
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,
children
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 from different family backgrounds used to gather together in school so there is a chance for them to follow and behave like other students.
Secondly
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, I believe that
parents
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 should motivate their
children
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.
Furthermore
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 , young
ones
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 consider their
parents
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 as their role models. So there is a high chance for them to follow their guardians
therefore
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, the
parents
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 should try to behave properly and should follow good traits.
In addition
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,
parents
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 are the only
one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
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 who can teach their
children
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 effectively with love and care. Apart from studies building good
character
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 is a very important part of our life.Even though
children
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 spend
majority
Add an article
the majority
a majority
show examples
 of their time in school it may be hard for teachers to give individuals attention. So
parents
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 should take the initiative on it. They should try to know the pulse of their child.
Besides
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, teach them how to respect others. Young
ones
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 used to grasp everything during their childhood which means it is more effective when compared to other stages of life. In conclusion, only guardians can give 100
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 to their off-springs. So it is always better and true that
parents
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 are responsible for moulding a child's
character
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.
As a result
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, I believe that
parents
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 should teach their heirs to be good members
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.
Submitted by ameeshaaa19 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • good members of society
  • teach
  • parents
  • schools
  • responsibility
  • values
  • respect
  • empathy
  • responsibility
  • formal education
  • citizenship
  • ethics
  • social responsibility
  • lead by example
  • role models
  • conducive environment
  • extracurricular activities
  • community involvement
  • collaborate
  • holistic approach
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