Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease. government should focus on reducing evironmental pollution and housing problems. To what extend do you agree or disagree
One school of thought holds that so as to prevent disease and illness, more attention should be put on alleviating environmental
pollution
and domestic problems. The writer is in favour of Use synonyms
this
viewpoint Linking Words
due to
the negative effects that toxic fumes and building heat cause on human life.
It is universally acknowledged that poisonous chemicals released into the atmosphere are the chief culprit for soaring respiratory illness rates. Linking Words
For instance
, nicotine and carbon monoxide threaten people with lung cancer and other fatal diseases through long-term exposure. Worse still, little has been done to reduce the emissions to make life safer for those who live in the surrounding areas. Linking Words
Therefore
, governments ought to help mitigate Linking Words
pollution
by implementing new policies and regulations that force factories to decline or even cease emitting detrimental substances into the air.
The heat from buildings is another concerning factor that does harm to human life. In fact, the use of ventilation systems contributing to climate change will eventually cause ailments to people, especially young children. During the daytime, air-conditioners are used to cool down the air Use synonyms
while
they turn out to be heaters at night. Linking Words
However
, both usages accumulate heat in buildings which makes the Earth warmer. Thereby, local authorities should take action to limit the use of these machines by imposing a heftier tax on the commodities to discourage people from buying them.
Linking Words
To sum up
, it is urgent that governments should control environmental Linking Words
pollution
, specifically air Use synonyms
pollution
, and housing problems like heating to prevent illnesses among residents.Use synonyms
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Improvement
To further enhance your essay, consider incorporating a wider variety of sentence structures and vocabulary. This will add to the richness of your writing and help maintain the reader's interest.
Improvement
While your examples are relevant, expanding them with more precise data or studies could strengthen your arguments and make them more compelling.
Structure
Your essay shows a strong logical structure, with a clear introduction, well-developed body paragraphs, and a concise conclusion. This contributes significantly to the coherence and cohesion of your response.
Argument
You did an excellent job of addressing the prompt, presenting a clear and comprehensive viewpoint on the importance of addressing environmental pollution and housing issues to prevent illness. Your arguments were relevant and supported with examples, which is commendable.
Examples
The use of specific examples, such as the impact of nicotine and carbon monoxide on health, effectively illustrates your point and makes your argument more persuasive.
Your opinion
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