IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Modern technoloys has made it easier for individuals to download copyrighted music. Is this a positive or negative development?

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There has been a topic raised about modern
technology
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 making
music
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 and
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books
Change the noun form
book
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 downloads easier to do.
However
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. Modern
technology
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also
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 creates possibilities to download
music
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 and
books
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 without having to pay for using the
content
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 and breaking copyright laws. The question is it good to have
this
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 modern
technology
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 with the
possibilities
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possibility
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 to use
authors
Change noun form
authors'
author's
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 and
music
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creators
Change noun form
creators'
creator's
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content
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 for free and how does it impact our society?
Firstly
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, we need to understand that
the
Correct article usage
apply
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authors, artist and creative people make their life out of creating listening and reading
content
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 for
the
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apply
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society. The authorized
books
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 and songs are created to bring us pleasure and
possitivity
Correct your spelling
positivity
possibility
.
Therefore
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, we need to understand that using modern
technology
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 to steal their
work
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 and avoid paying for it is breaking a law. But using creative
work
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 for free is not a problem caused by modern
technology
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. The problem comes from
the
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apply
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human and
Correct pronoun usage
their need
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need
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needs
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 to take and cheaper route to have what he desires.
In contrast
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 to that, illegal downloads of
music
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 and
books
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 are mostly used by users who can not afford to buy the artist's product. Or even more importantly they want to download it and use it as an inspiration for them-self. The easy downloads created a way to read and listen for more amazing
work
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 that has been created all around the world. It
also
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 opens up unlimited possibilities for various
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
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,
creations
Correct word choice
and creations
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 which in some cases might not be accessible in the downloader’s country. In
this
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case
Add a comma
,case
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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modern
technology
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 brings the point that more internet users can access and enjoy
authors
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authors'
author's
show examples
work
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.
Concluding
Replace the word
Conclusion
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this
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 topic, I do think that modern
technology
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 creates an easier way to download copyrighted products.
Therefore
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, I think
this
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 problem should be solved. Because the artist
as
Correct word choice
and
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 everyone else in the world deserves to get
payed
Wrong verb form
paid
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 for their
work
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.
Instead
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 of using modern
technology
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 to steal society should learn to use it for good reasons and should find a way to reach their desired
content
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 without having to steal it.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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