Nowadays, more and more older people who need employment compete with the younger people for the same jobs. What problems this causes? What are solutions?

#people #employment #jobs

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Despite modern professions increase

such

Linking Words

as online content maker,

blogger

Add an article

a blogger

show examples

with high payment which could attract millions of teenagers and adults there are other millions of young

people

Use synonyms

who want to

work

Use synonyms

for the government so the competition between two generations for white collar jobs

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

still exist. Even though elderly

people

Use synonyms

are retired they

prefer

Add the particle

toprefer

show examples

stay at

workplace

Add an article

the workplace

show examples

as long as they can.

First

Add an article

The first

show examples

reason can be love towards their

work

Use synonyms

or in order to not

Fix the infinitive

apply

show examples

lose the chance to earn money. I believe that

this

Linking Words

problem is related to the low level of pension which retired

people

Use synonyms

get monthly. It is not deniable that these days, the cost of living is unreasonably increased, and undoubtedly not all citizens can afford what they really need or just want. Sometimes it may have devastating consequences

Change preposition

for

show examples

development

Add an article

the development

show examples

of the businesses,

moreover

Linking Words

, of the country.

For instance

Linking Words

old

Add an article

an old

show examples

generation used to

work

Use synonyms

and think systematically, they will not come up with any useful project

comparing

Wrong verb form

compared

show examples

new

Add an article

a new

the new

show examples

generation which

speculate

Change the verb form

speculates

show examples

differently and can offer new ideas

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

furthermore

Linking Words

they are aware of the latest technology. The solving problem lies in stopping the inflation of prices or increasing the

percent

Replace the word

percentage

show examples

of the pension. Governments have to control

this

Linking Words

case through a law.

Additionally

Linking Words

, they should promote new workplaces for those

people

Use synonyms

who just want to

work

Use synonyms

for pleasure. In conclusion, in my view, the root cause of rivalry is the

luck

Correct your spelling

lack

show examples

of sustained programs for retired

person

Fix the agreement mistake

people

show examples

. Authorities ought to take into account

creation

Correct article usage

the creation

show examples

the

Change preposition

of the

show examples

comfortability

Replace the word

comfort

show examples

for

Change preposition

show examples

our ancestors. So, they can relax, look after their children or pets and just advise us

Submitted by berikkozha.eren on Fri Mar 24 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

4.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

272 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

Intergenerational competition
Age discrimination
Adaptability
Hiring practices
Workforce diversity
Upskilling
Lifelong learning
Flexible working arrangements
Ageism
Technological proficiency
Productivity concerns
Diverse skillsets
Legislative protection
Employment equity
Biases

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this a positive or negative thing?
At present, suburb dwellers in some nations around the world, are relocating to towns looking for searching jobs and better lives, however, the rural society left with fewer people.Personally, I believe that others are benefiting from working and also enjoying their lives in urban areas.
5
band
In some cultures, children are often told they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advanages and disadvantages of gibing children this message?
There is no denying that with the rapid development of social norms, educational standards and approaches have become significantly diverse. As such, the signigicance of education on the sense of hard working have been increasingly recognized. While some people look upon asking children to make efforts contributes to their ultimate high-achievement, others advocate that children should not be placed excessive strain. Despite pushing children by strict inquiries driving a potential in better personal outcome, it cause negatives in the same time.
7.5
band
The prevention of health problems and illness is more important than treatment and medicine. Government funding should reflect this. To what extent do you agree?
The most annoying thing that humans must face is the disease. However, it keeps appearing and transforming into another virus with new symptoms and people can not finish it with a simple cure. Therefore, there are ample healthy activities that help prevent sickness or slow down the progress of health issues. Moreover, public healthcare should prioritize using their fee to pay more attention to this problem.
7
band
In some countries children have very strict rules of behaviour, in other countries, they are allowed to do almost anything they want. To what extent should children have to follow rules?
In this contemporary epoch, some nations carry extremely strict regulations for providing excellent social skills to juveniles while the remaining allot a high level of freedom to them, to do whatever they want. This essay will delve into the importance of the level of freedom that should be rendered to children.
7
band
There have been several complaints about the reception area where visitors to your company arrive. Your manager has asked you to suggest how the reception area could be improved. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter • describe the complaints that have been made • say why the reception area is important • suggest how the reception area could be
I am writing this letter report the recent complaints regarding the express packages receiving issue at our reception desk. As more employees choose to deliver their goods purchased from online stores to our company's address, the part of the area is often occupied by those packages not claimed and fetched by their real consignees immediately.

Nowadays, more and more older people who need employment compete with the younger people for the same jobs. What problems this causes? What are solutions?

Fully explain your ideas

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this a positive or negative thing?

In some cultures, children are often told they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advanages and disadvantages of gibing children this message?

The prevention of health problems and illness is more important than treatment and medicine. Government funding should reflect this. To what extent do you agree?

In some countries children have very strict rules of behaviour, in other countries, they are allowed to do almost anything they want. To what extent should children have to follow rules?