In many countries, people increasingly talk about money such as how much they earn or how much they pay for things in their daily conversations. Why? Is this a positive or negative trend?

#countries #people #money #conversations #trend

One of the major issues that concern our society today is whether the fact that

people

talk constantly about

money

in their daily routine is beneficial or not. Strong arguments exist for

this

viewpoint, which implies that it is worth examining its perspective before reaching any conclusion.

To begin

with, in

this

day and age, especially in countries with economic crises,

people

care a lot about the amount of

money

that they spend daily.

For example

, when the wages are extremely low but the prices of products are high, citizens struggle to make ends meet.

For

this

reason, I believe that their daily expenditures are important to them.

Also

, another reason is the competition among

people

. To be more precise, many individuals want to know the number of others' earnings only because of jealousy. In

this

way, the issue of

money

is always on the table.

However

, to my mind,

this

trend could have only detrimental effects on an individual's life. From the moment that

people

communicate so often how much they earn, subconsciously the only thing that matters to them is

money

For instance

, even if they have enough

money

to spend on their entertainment, they will not do it because they think that it is not necessary. In

this

way, they miss essential things from their lives,

such

as any kind of entertainment which can be

proved

Verb problem

apply

show examples

beneficial for their well-being. In conclusion, it is my firm belief that

people

need to keep

private

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

their earnings and talk about more serious issues, like poverty and the ways through which they could help. So,

people

do not end up being materialistic and care only about

money

Submitted by eirininikou109 on Fri Mar 24 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that the introduction and conclusion are clearly present and adequately address the task. The introduction should provide a clear overview of the main topic and the writer's perspective. The conclusion should summarise the main points and provide a clear recommendation or opinion.

task response

The essay provides a complete response to the task by addressing both aspects of the question and providing a clear opinion. The ideas are well-developed and supported with relevant examples. However, ensure that the focus is maintained on addressing the specific aspects of the task, such as the reasons for the trend and whether it is positive or negative.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that the main points are supported with specific examples and evidence. Additionally, make sure to maintain a clear and logical structure throughout the essay, with appropriate use of linking words and cohesive devices.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

277 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

consumerism
materialism
financial transparency
societal taboos
economic fluctuations
financial management
financial literacy
purchasing decisions
wealth glorification
economic stratification
social comparison
peer pressure
income disparity

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In many countries, people increasingly talk about money such as how much they earn or how much they pay for things in their daily conversations. Why? Is this a positive or negative trend?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Today, more and more people want things instantly (e.g., goods, service, news,). Why is this? Is it a positive or negative development?

Young people are often influenced in their behaviours and situations by others in the same age. This is called peer pressure. Do the disadvantages of this issue outweigh advanages of it.

Although the prices of fuels have greatly increased over the last decade or two, it is argued that further increases in fuel prices are the only way to reduce world consumption of fuel and lessen pressure on the world`s fuel resources. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

The media tends to focus on problems rather than positive developments. Some people think that this is harmful to individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

some think increasing business and culural contact between nations is positive. Others think it leads to the dissappearance of national identity. Discuss both Views and state your own opinion.