IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people prefer living in hot climates while others prefer colder countries. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #climates #countries
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It has been argued by many individuals that warm weather is for living,
whereas
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 opponents prefer the winter
season
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. In my opinion, I favour the former perspective;
however
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,
this
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 essay shall dwell on both viewpoints in the subsequent paragraphs
along with
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 a reasoned conclusion. On the one hand, the prominent benefit of living in
summer
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the summer
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season
Use synonyms
 will be able to lead a healthy lifestyle. In warmer countries,
people
Use synonyms
 may easily go outside which gives them the ability to do activities
such
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 as jogging, skipping, running, swimming and
play
Wrong verb form
playing
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 sports games.
For instance
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, a survey conducted by Harward University revealed that 90% of human beings
of
Change preposition
in
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 China and Japan prefer to
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
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take part in outdoor activities in hot climates with the assistance of
this
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 they have become
happiest
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a happiest
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 and healthier
person
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people
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.
Hence
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, it puts
positive
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a positive
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 effect on
people
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's well-being.
On the other hand
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,
people
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 might enjoy the beauty of the colder weather. In the chilly
season
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,
snow fall
Correct your spelling
snowfall
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 into the hills which gives
beautiful
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a beautiful
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 view and the commoners could take pictures or
making
Wrong verb form
make
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 videos of it for the memory of their entire life
as well as
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 the population can wear fashionable outfits in that
season
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.
For example
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, it is published an article by The Tribune newspaper showed that approximately 55% of humans have fun in
cold
Add an article
the cold
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season
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with
Change preposition
by
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 making videos and uploaded on
online
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the online
an online
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platform
Fix the agreement mistake
platforms
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.
Due to
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 above mentioned, I favour the same.
To conclude
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,
although
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people
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 might become health-conscious
people
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 when they
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
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exercise on the ground or in parks, I personally believed that
people
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 can see glaciers.
Submitted by deepikanayyar1996 on

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