The best way for the country to prepare for future is to invest on the young people. Do you agree and disagree?

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In today's world, more than half of the population is below 40 years old.
This
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is applicable to almost every country in the world. In developing countries like India and ,Nepal the percentage of the population who are young is more than sixty per cent.
Such
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countries should heavily invest in future generations as it is essential. I totally agree with
this
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statement. In
this
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essay, I will provide an explanation to support my argument. One of the reasons why enough resources should be provided to young people is the energy they have. Older people may not have the same energy as young people.
For example
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, energy is needed for soldiers to serve in the army. In
such
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,places we cannot place someone else who does not have the strength. Another reason is the change in technology. Technology is changing every other day. Older folks often find it difficult to keep up with
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change.
For Instance
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, a recent study shows that more than fifty per cent of the population who are older than 50 years do not know how to use the internet. If countries keep investing in
such
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communities
then
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the outcome will be a disaster.
To conclude
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, it is very important to invest in future generations because they have the spirit and stamina to help society progress. And society cannot only progress with the younger crowd as they do not have the experience of the older crowd.
This
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experience is
also
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very essential. So there is no other way for society to progress without its younger citizens.
Submitted by ahmedcse14 on

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Structuring
Try to use more varied sentence structures to enhance the logical progression of your points. Some sentences seemed fragmented or simplistic.
Organisation
There needs to be a clear distinction between your introduction, body and conclusion. In some parts they blend together. Make sure to differentiate them.
Content
The examples used to support your arguments need to be more specific. Some of them are too broad and vague. Brining in some real-life examples or data would strengthen your arguments.
Task Response
Your essay shows a balanced view, but the question asked whether you agree or disagree. Remember to answer the question directly and to stick to a singular viewpoint for the entirety of your response for a higher score.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • foster
  • innovation
  • economic growth
  • vocational training
  • apprenticeships
  • entrepreneurship
  • mentorship
  • economic diversification
  • civic engagement
  • leadership training
  • cultural exchange
  • interconnected world
  • robust curriculum
  • hands-on skills
  • job-ready
  • self-reliance
  • physically and mentally healthy
  • active participants
  • global understanding
  • stimulate
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