Nowadays a growing number of boys and girls within normal weight ranges have an intense fear of gaining weight and therefore get anorexia. Why do you think a lot of teenagers have a strong desire to be skinny? What can be done to prevent this eating disorder?

#boys #girls #weight #ranges #fear #anorexia #teenagers #desire #disorder

Recently, it has become an ongoing issue that teenagers have

persured

Correct your spelling

pressured

presumed

to be skinny regardless of their sex.

This

essay will present my personal view with respect to

this

current trend and will suggest several solutions dealing with

subsecuential

Correct your spelling

subsequential

eating

disorder

Fix the agreement mistake

disorders

show examples

To begin

with, in

modern

Add an article

the modern

show examples

world, it has been beauty criteria that

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

skinny is more attractive.

Nevertheless

Add a comma

,Nevertheless

show examples

this

notion is too simplified, it has been rooted in

youngsters

Change noun form

youngsters'

youngster's

show examples

mind

Correct subject-verb agreement

minds

show examples

deeply to the point where it can be hardly removed. In fact, I had a classmate who was suffered from anorexia and she eventually dropped out of my school

since

Correct word choice

because

show examples

she sent

for

Change preposition

show examples

hospital

Correct article usage

the hospital

show examples

owning

Correct your spelling

owing

show examples

to malnutrient. Through the experience, I got to

storongly

Correct your spelling

strongly

believe that nothing is

important

Correct quantifier usage

more important

show examples

than being healthy both mentally and physically, still less,

to be

Change the verb form

being

show examples

beautiful never

outweigh

Correct subject-verb agreement

outweighs

show examples

. One key reason

Change preposition

for

show examples

this

trend can be

attibuted

Correct your spelling

attributed

to our lack of respect

toward

Change preposition

for

show examples

food

. After

period

Add an article

a period

show examples

of double world wars, we

less

Add a missing verb

were less

show examples

appreciated for

food

despite famine

had

Wrong verb form

having

show examples

been common about a century ago.

Additionally

this

ill-trend has been

acceralated

Correct your spelling

accelerated

Correct article usage

the occurence

show examples

occurence

Correct your spelling

occurrence

of cheap

fastfood

Correct your spelling

fast food

Thus

, I believe it is important for teenagers to be educated

the

Change preposition

on the

show examples

importance of substantials in school lessons by being taught about

history

Add an article

the history

show examples

of famine and

function

Correct article usage

the function

show examples

food

nutritions

Fix the agreement mistake

nutrition

show examples

for example

. It will enhance

thier

Correct your spelling

their

understanding of eating

habit

Fix the agreement mistake

habits

show examples

for

Change preposition

show examples

human

Add an article

a human

the human

show examples

being

Fix the agreement mistake

beings

show examples

. In conclusion,

young

Add an article

the young

show examples

generation has been likely to

exssesively

Correct your spelling

excessively

desire to be

thiner

Correct your spelling

thinner

, which can lead

recent

Change preposition

to recent

show examples

social

peoblem

Correct your spelling

problem

eading

Correct your spelling

eating

reading

disorder

Fix the agreement mistake

disorders

show examples

However

, I believe it can be dealt with by

schhols’

Correct your spelling

schools

provision of sufficient knowledge of

food

importance

Replace the word

imports

show examples

Submitted by lisa_smile_2 on Mon Mar 27 2023

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
44Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

263 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Nowadays a growing number of boys and girls within normal weight ranges have an intense fear of gaining weight and therefore get anorexia. Why do you think a lot of teenagers have a strong desire to be skinny? What can be done to prevent this eating disorder?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The gap between rich and poor is growing. What problems does this create? What can be done to tackle this.

Traditions are about the past and innovation is about the future, and it has been argued that we need to let go of traditions for the sake of progress. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this? What role should traditions have in our lives?

In today’s society people tend to buy many things and throw them away even though they can still be used. What are some causes of this behaviour? What are some effects? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.