IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Young people committing crimes should be treated the same as adults by the authorities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #crimes #adults #authorities
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In our modern society,lawlessness and more and more young perpetrating lawbreaking should behave the same as mature powers.From my way of thinking,
this
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 type of perspective is not true.
This
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 essay will discuss
this
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 conditionʼs positive and negative aspects for young individuals and,
also
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 society. On the one hand,it has a lot of negative sides.Because If the law will be equal for the young and older populations,
also
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 adults fit a lot of suffering like older folk.First of all,it will affect childrenʼs psychology.
For
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this
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 reason, the young families lose the love which was been to live.They think that every community pain from
this
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 condition in their forthcoming growth.Second of all,they may lose their health through it.Because after that by it they lose their health.For
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 ,reason much older societies that are scandals,suffer a lot of time not to repeat these sins in their future life.
That is
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 why in my opinion,adults do not endure
this
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 type of condition because older humans
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 barely to
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 state.
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, civilization loses clever and knowledgeable young.Because some teens who occur corruption, may be good people in the future,but If they suffer in the cells like an older person,they do not want to be good people in the future life.
On the other hand
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,it has little profit.Because by it youngs do not occur their crimes other times.Take as an example,nowadays young personʼs corruption is decreasing through it. In a nutshell,
this
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 condition has lots of negatives than profits.From my point of view,many laws should create by thinking of young nations.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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