some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #attention

Presently, it is widely believed by some entrepreneurs that advertising has a crucial role

to attract

Change preposition

in attracting

show examples

potential buyers of their

products

However

, others opine that it is an ineffective way as people just pay attention to it for a moment.

This

essay will elaborate on

this

issue and give my personal perspective. In

this

cutting-edge technology era, adverts

give

Verb problem

make

show examples

a huge contribution to a successful

business

. Apple,

for instance

, a well-known technology company from the USA, introduced its

products

through fascinating advertising. The way Apple launched its brands not only brings financial benefits as people across the globe desire to have Apple's goods but

also

inspires numerous

companies

to do the same in terms of promoting their commodities.

Moreover

, based on plenty of research, today's

business

has a tendency to allocate a

big

Correct word choice

large

show examples

amount of money solely for advertising.

Hence

, advertising is significant in determining

business

advancement.

Nevertheless

, many consider that advertising is less important. The notion is based on some leading

companies

which gain success without any advertising. Taking Xiaomi as an example,

this

manufacturer has high confidence in its product quality and affordable price. Some

products

such

as smartphones and cameras can compete with other

companies

without any promotion.

In addition

, some of Xiaomi's

products

, particularly several mobile phone series, became the best seller in the marketplace.

As a result

, advertising is not as crucial as other strategies including product quality and price. In conclusion, utilizing advertising in

business

is a debatable topic. In my opinion, even

companies

should spend their money to advertise their goods, advertising has a pivotal role in their growth. It is one of the best ways to attract the community to purchase their

products

Submitted by salwafahanim on Sat Apr 01 2023

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task response

Task Response: The essay addresses the prompt by discussing both views on the effectiveness of advertising and providing a personal opinion. The ideas are relevant and contribute to the discussion effectively.

Coherence and Cohesion: The essay demonstrates a logical structure with well-organized paragraphs. The introduction and conclusion are clear and present, and the main points are supported with relevant examples. To improve, focus on using transition words and phrases to enhance the coherence between paragraphs.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

281 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

persuade
promote
attract
influence
impact
consumerism
commercialism
market
product
brand
endorsement
manipulative
saturated
overwhelmed
repetitive
distracting
irrelevant
exaggerated
misleading
desensitized

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some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternatoves medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

In many countries large amounts of foods are wasted. Why do you think people waste food in this way? What can be done to reduce the amount of food thrown away? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

In some cities public parks and open spaces are being changed into gardens where local residents can grow their own fruit and vegetables. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In the past, lectures were the traditional method of teaching large numbers of students in a classroom. Nowadays new technology is increasingly being used to teach students. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this new approach to teaching?