IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

These days in some countries an increasing number of young adults are choosing their whole weekends inside homes. Why do you think it is happening ? Is this a positive or negative development?

#countries #adults #weekends #homes #development
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Nowadays in some countries
growing
Correct article usage
a growing
show examples
 number of young adults are selecting their entire
day-off
Correct your spelling
day off
show examples
 at
home
.In
this
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
 I will clarify
bad
Correct article usage
the bad
show examples
 and good sides of staying at
home
 at the weekends thoroughly. To commence with in my way of thinking, it is true that many
people
staying
Wrong verb form
stay
show examples
 at their house at the weekends
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is a good idea.
Particular
Add an article
The particular
A particular
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 reason for the circumstance, when
people
 worked none stop
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a week, they will get a kick out of
unwind
Wrong verb form
unwinding
show examples
at
Change the preposition
on
show examples
sundays
Change the capitalization
Sundays
show examples
. Their brain requires
to
Correct pronoun usage
them to
show examples
 take
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
rest
at
Change preposition
for at
show examples
 least one day. Working
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 a whole week without stop, it could be
bad
Correct article usage
a bad
show examples
 impact
their
Change preposition
on their
show examples
 health.
This
 actively demonstrates that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
people
choosing
Wrong verb form
choose
show examples
 to stay at
home
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 a
day-off
Correct your spelling
day off
show examples
. Turning
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the drawbacks of staying at
flat
Correct article usage
a flat
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 or an apartment
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 an entire day,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
 could bring out
sense
Add an article
a sense
the sense
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 of
lazyness
Correct your spelling
laziness
.
For instance
,
people
Change preposition
in people
show examples
 who waste their time
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
sleeping or lying down
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 a full day,
headache
Fix the agreement mistake
headaches
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 or some kind of
diseases
Fix the agreement mistake
disease
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 could
be appear
Change the verb form
appear
show examples
.
Additionally
,
according to
 scientists:
people
 who have a hectic schedule on weekdays and by working endlessly, they got tired,
hence
, they prefer to stay at
home
and
Correct word choice
which
show examples
 can reduce their stress.
To sum
up
Add a comma
,up
show examples
 everything that has been stated so far, nowadays young
people
 prefer to enjoy their weekend in their house rather than going outside because they feel, by doing so they can calm their body.
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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