IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Financial education should be mandatory component of the school program. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#education #component #school #program
Many people say that financial education should be a compulsory part of the school's modular program.
Therefore
, I strongly coincide with the same opinion.
To begin
 with, at an early ,age children should be taught how to manage
money
 and finances.
For
this
 reason, they have a sneak-peak of the world that they are living in.
For instance
, introducing different currencies of other countries to students.
Consequently
, they come to know the different conversions of
money
 in some nations and which currency has a higher value than the other.
Furthermore
, it is a dire need for kids to be informed enough about how to manage their allowances so that they can develop a sense of responsibility
as well as
 independence.
As a result
, they can have full control of their income to properly handle or even save it.
In addition
, through financial management education, youngsters can have the proper knowledge on how to prioritize and weigh
things
 so that they can spend their
money
 wisely. It is like gauging needs over wants. On top of that, they will be not enticed with buying
things
 that are not necessary. Take me as an example, whenever I am thinking of buying a new set of clothes or a trending pair of shoes, I think of it multiple times
first,
before deciding if I should really buy those items or not. And most of the time, I am ending up with the decision not to purchase it yet since my personal items are still in good condition.
Hence
, I became a wise person when it comes to spending
money
 and did not end up wasting my income on
things
 that are not really beneficial at the moment. All in all, financial management as part of the school program is crucial as it can teach young minds the different currencies of other countries. Another thing is that they get to develop a sense of responsibility and discipline in managing their own finances that they can actually use when they become an adult.
Furthermore
, it teaches students to be wise spenders in the future. To weigh
things
 first if it is a priority or not.
Therefore
, they save spending their
money
 on
things
 that are far more important than gratifying items.
Submitted by kmaegalilee on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: