IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Many people try to achieve success through their career or education. What can success mean to different people? What is your view of success?

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It is a common thought that
success
Use synonyms
 can be achieved only by focusing on traditional studies and the employment system.
However
Linking Words
, it can have a different meaning for some other people,
such
Linking Words
 as having a good family
life
Use synonyms
. I think
success
Use synonyms
 is a satisfaction that can vary from
person
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 to
person
Use synonyms
 and depends on different situations.
To begin
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 with, a good proportion of society believes that
success
Use synonyms
 is a result of hard work and consistent efforts in their student
life
Use synonyms
 and later, in their professional career,
while
Linking Words
 others are being succeeded without a career. Though the first group is not in the wrong way, dependency on a single track to achieve goals can be detrimental to them.
On the other hand
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, there are some people who think that having a satisfactory
life
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 with family is more important.
For example
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, a famous Bangladeshi writer named Naimul Islam has written in a book that if anyone's family isn't happy, he/she can't be a successful
person
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.
Moreover
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, if a
person
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 with a good education has no family
life
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, he/she will face social problems in the near future.
According to
Linking Words
 my opinion,
success
Use synonyms
 is a feeling which depends on many things. Generally, different persons feel
this
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 feeling in different kinds of situations.
For instance
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, a rich man can be unsuccessful, if he thinks that he is not complacent enough.
However
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, a poor man with utter satisfaction can consider himself a successful human.
Therefore
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, I think,
success
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 should be treated as a feeling. In conclusion, a lot of the public tries to gain
success
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 by choosing a conventional career path but there are others who prefer their family
life
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 to succeed. Meanwhile, I believe,
success
Use synonyms
 is not any specific thing and its meaning changes with community, time and situations.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure your essay has a clear and logical structure. While there is some organization, transitions between ideas could be smoother. Use linking words effectively to show the relationship between the paragraphs and main points.
task achievement
Your response addresses the prompt, but consider expanding on your ideas with more specific examples. Each paragraph should ideally contain a clear main idea followed by supporting details and examples.
lexical resource
Aim to use a wider range of vocabulary appropriate for the topic. This can also help you avoid repetition of certain words or phrases. Employ synonyms and more complex expression to convey nuanced arguments.
grammatical range
Incorporate a variety of sentence structures to demonstrate grammatical range. Use complex sentences and different clause structures to add depth to your essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • fulfillment
  • personal goals
  • happiness
  • career milestones
  • professional development
  • financial independence
  • security
  • philanthropy
  • contribution
  • personal development
  • recognition
  • work-life balance
  • self-improvement
  • well-being
  • subjective
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