IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Write about following topic: Some people believe that children are given too much free time. They feel that this time should be used to do more school work. How do you think children should spend their free time? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#topic #people #children #time #school #work
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in recent years,
children
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 using free
time
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 to do
school
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work
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 has become increasingly popular around the world, and some people argue that free
time
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 should be used to do more
school
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work
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.
while
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 I agree that
children
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 should spend some free
time
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 doing more
school
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work
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, I believe that the balance in using free
time
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 should be considered. on the hand, the option to
children
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 do more
school
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work
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 by using their free
time
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 is attractive for several reasons. Many
students
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 to
want
Add the particle
towant
show examples
 learn more knowledge when they have free
time
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, in
this
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 way, they can become smart, and they will be able to understand something before they go to class. in terms of their
study
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 career,
students
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 decide to use their free
time
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 to
study
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, rather than play video games. They will have the chance to achieve high scores when doing the exam.
this
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 is may lead to a successful learning career.
on the other hand
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, I believe that it is more beneficial for
students
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 to enjoy their free
time
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.
Firstly
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, the
study
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 is not the only thing they have learned.
for example
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, it is impossible to become have more friends and learn some hobbies without having free
time
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.
As a result
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,
students
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 planning their free
time
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 can help their independence and organizing abilities.
secondly
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, it can help
students
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 become outgoing For the reasons mentioned above, it seems to me that
children
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 are more likely to enjoy free
time
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. because they are still young,
also
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 they have to learn something more than
study
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.
Submitted by danielyuhengqu on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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