Governments should ban dangerous sports. Others think that people should have the freedom to do any sport activity. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

The issue of taking part in dangerous
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
remains controversial. There is a number of
people
hold
Correct pronoun usage
who hold
show examples
a claiming view that
its
Change the pronoun
it
show examples
is their personal benefit to play any
sport
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sports
show examples
activity.
However
, there are
people
having the opposite idea which is government should give an outright ban
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
reckless
sports
.
This
essay would analyse aspects of the problem. On the other side of the argument, there are several good points supporting the opinion saying that
people
have the rights to choose any
sports
they wish to. Most of those in
favor
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favour
show examples
for
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of
show examples
this
viewpoint usually claim that regardless of the risks, playing extreme
sports
can help
achieving
Wrong verb form
achieve
show examples
many skills. To be specific, by putting oneself into
dangerous
Add an article
a dangerous
show examples
situation, one’s potential will be developed and one is able to
pursuit
Replace the word
pursue
show examples
such
desire.
For instance
, a kid inspired by
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
pro racing
athletes
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athlete
show examples
will end up
fulfil
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fulfilling
show examples
his dream and
become
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becoming
show examples
a famous star in the future. On the
orther
Correct your spelling
other
side of the fence, it cannot be denied that there are still other
people
hold
Correct pronoun usage
who hold
show examples
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
idea that dangerous
sports
should be banned by the government. And
oviously
Correct your spelling
obviously
, their justification
seem
Change the verb form
seems
show examples
convincing as well. For a start, it could be
agree
Wrong verb form
agreed
show examples
that
people
taking in extreme
sports
have
high
Add an article
a high
show examples
risk of injury. Many activities like skateboarding, surfing, racing, bull riding, etc
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
effected
Correct your spelling
affected
show examples
individuals badly and
cause
Wrong verb form
caused
show examples
injuries like swallow muscles, sprains and strains.
Besides
,
this
opinion
appear
Change the verb form
appears
show examples
reasonable
due to
the fact that doing risky
sports
can influence and damage
people
as well as
infrastructure. Thrill-seeking adrenaline junkies sometimes unpurposely hurt innocent bystanders which could lead to many unfortunate
cause
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causes
show examples
.
Fromw
Correct your spelling
From
what
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
been discussed, from my perspective, I highly recommend
people
to play any
kinds
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kind
show examples
of sport but with high
cautions
Fix the agreement mistake
caution
show examples
and carefulness.
Submitted by lenguyenminhthu23799 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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