Most people accept that we now live in a globalised world but not everyone agrees that this is benefcial. To what extent is globalisation a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or examples

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In the modern

Use synonyms

world

Add a comma

world,

show examples

globalization is inevitable. It connects the whole

world

Use synonyms

regardless of location, gender or race. At present, we are able to witness different cultures and various living habits

due to

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

global connectivity. Obviously, globalization has many perks. Meanwhile, it

also

Linking Words

carries negative aspects.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss the positive and negative developments

due to

Linking Words

these worldwide interactions. In the past, communities lived merely in isolation. They had little relationships with the outside

world

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. The Europeans were able to reach the American continent and the Asian continent in the latter part of the 15th century. Gradually, with the development of naval transportation, people were able to discover the new

world

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Subsequently

Linking Words

, the

industrial revolution

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Industrial Revolution

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helped to connect more and more nations together. By the end of the

20th-century

Correct your spelling

20th century

whole

world

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was linked to an extensive network. In

this

Linking Words

new age, anyone can access any information at any time. For

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

instance, I can buy a mobile phone from a Japanese vendor through the Internet or I am able to follow news in America.

Therefore

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

worldwide phenomenon has increased the efficiency and convenience of life.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, the distribution of every living norm has not been even.

For example

Linking Words

, Indian people are embracing a Western lifestyle. Particularly, eating habits and dressing preferences have been altered drastically.

Consequently

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, indigenous traditions are endangered. Some unique customs and morals have been extinct. In conclusion, globalization is an essential factor for the developing

world

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. It connects territories and nourishes countries. The

world

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will not be the same as now if it wasn’t for

this

Linking Words

rapid development. Simultaneously, it destroys authentic living habits and cultural diversity. Considering the above reasons, the positive movement appears to overrule the negative movement.

wmpabasara2Wed Apr 05 2023

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coherence cohesion

Your essay presents a well-organized structure with a clear introduction and conclusion. However, you might want to improve the logical flow between some of your paragraphs. Use cohesive devices like linking words to ensure a smoother transition.

task achievement

While you have addressed both the positive and negative aspects of globalization, providing more specific examples and detailed analysis could strengthen your argument. For instance, mention actual cultural traditions or specific benefits related to global trade.

task achievement

You have provided a clear response to the task, but try to expand your points more comprehensively. Going deeper into how globalization specifically improves life or how exactly indigenous cultures are threatened would make your arguments more persuasive.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear structure with a well-defined introduction and conclusion, which helps to effectively communicate your arguments.

task achievement

The essay covers both sides of the argument, acknowledging the positive and negative impacts of globalization, which brings balance to your discussion.

task achievement

You have demonstrated a good command of English, with appropriate vocabulary choices and generally accurate grammar.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

289 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Cultural exchange
Economic growth
Technological advancements
Cultural homogenisation
Economic disparity
Multinational corporations
Local businesses
Climate change
Collaboration
Mutual understanding

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