IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Nowadays, more and more people decide to have children later in their life. Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages

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Planning to have a child is one of the paramount decisions in a couple's life. These days the number of people who prefer to have a baby later is dramatically increasing.I believe that
this
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 trend has more benefits than drawbacks. In general, it is better to procreate after a lot of time but with
satisfactional
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satisfactory
 circumstances
instead
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 of having a newborn in a hurry.
In other words
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, men can improve their financial and social conditions to support their families, their kids and their daughters.
Otherwise
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, eighteen years old individuals who haven't the necessary experience of life and can not either correctly
up bring
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upbring
 a child , nor can not adequately ensure an infant's needs like diapers , milk , and an accurate meal . Another benefit of having a baby after certain decades of life is accumulating essential experience.
For instance
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, in the early part of his existence , a person must spend most of the money developing his own personality and other characteristics in order to be an incredible parent.
On the other hand
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, leaving for later
so
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apply
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important themes like offspring is a very disadvantageous determination.
Firstly
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, humans can lose the opportunity to be fathers or mothers because of deciding to reproduce later.
For example
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 , scientists confirmed the high possibility
to become
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of becoming
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 infertile after certain years. The second drawback is losing sexual interest
due to
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 age, approximately thirty-five old, people will no longer be desired to have children. In conclusion,
although
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 there are certain negatives ,
such
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 as infertility and sexual interest , I believe that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

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coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is somewhat consistent but could be improved by organizing the ideas in a clearer and more coherent manner. Make sure to use transition words and phrases to connect ideas and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present but lack depth and clarity. Work on providing a more engaging introduction that sets up the essay's main points and a conclusion that wraps up the discussion effectively.
task achievement
The essay provides a partially complete response to the task, addressing both advantages and disadvantages of having children later in life. However, the ideas are not fully developed, and more specific examples could be provided to support the main points.
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