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Band 6

The pie charts below gives information on the proportion of carbohydrates, protein and fat in three different diets

The pie charts below gives information on the proportion of carbohydrates, protein and fat in three different diets
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The pie charts illustrate information on the
proportion
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 of carbohydrates, protein and fat in
three
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 different diets. There are
three
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 kinds of diets, namely Average
diet
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, Healthy
diet
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, and healthy
diet
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 for sport. The
proportion
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 of carbohydrates in the
three
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 types of
diet
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 is different. The average
diet
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 needs 40% which is lower than the healthy
diet
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 with a
proportion
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 of 50% and the healthy
diet
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 for sport needs more than the two other diets, which are 60%. The need for protein on
average
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an average
the average
show examples
diet
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 is 40% which is the largest than the others. A healthy
diet
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 needs 30% and
healthy
Correct article usage
a healthy
show examples
diet
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 for sports is the lowest with 25% from 100%. Fat
proportion
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 is the lowest of the
three
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 kinds of
diet
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. Average
diet
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 and healthy
diet
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 need 20%. A healthy
diet
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 for sport just needs 15%.
Overall
Linking Words
, a Healthy
diet
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 for sports needs the most Carbohydrates. The need for fat is the lowest of the
three
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 kinds of
diet
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. Protein is needed more for the average
diet
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.

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Linking words: Add more linking words.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 80%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words proportion, three, diet with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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