In some countries, there has been an increase in the number of parents, who are choosing to educate children themselves at home instead of sending them to school. Do the advantages of home education outweigh the disadvantages?

In some nations, there has been a rise in the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
of parents who are willing to teach their children themselves at
home
rather than let them attend to
education
Add an article
the education
show examples
system.
This
writer argues that the benefits of freedom in studying and the reduction of tuition fees outweigh the drawbacks of focusing on kids. The most advantageous factor of education at
home
is that children can study in various ways. They will study from online classes or do knowledge research on the internet.
Moreover
, they can
also
buy practice books or do online tests in order to improve their skills.
In addition
, students may make a personal schedule to manage time effectively so that avoid obeying stereotypes in school and feel stressed.
Consequently
, they will be comfortable and balance between studying and taking a rest. It may
also
enhance their own learning skills.
This
may be true in the US, students can stay at
home
and take part in virtual classes without going to institutions. Another point that must be considered is that parents do not need to pay tuition fees. It can help them save money and energy for other purposes. What is more, they spend money on buying books or supporting facilities to serve children’s activities.
Besides
that, it contributes to increasing the finance and affordability of operations daily.
As a result
, parents can utilize money for different aims
instead
of costs in schools. It is evident that some people do not invest in university so they make their own acquiring savvy.
However
, a few people are reluctant to learn at
home
. They believe that holding kids in the house will make them become addicted to technological gadgets and alone.
This
is a fact in some families, but if adults concentrate on their son and daughter more carefully, they can keep them away from appealing to social media or playing video games. Taking all points into account, the impact of freedom in learning and
reduction
Correct article usage
the reduction
show examples
of academic costs are more beneficial than the distraction of studying.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Your response addresses the task, presenting both advantages and disadvantages; however, ensure that your arguments are fully developed. Consider adding more specific examples to strengthen your points.
coherence cohesion
The essay follows a logical structure with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. Ensure smooth transitions between paragraphs and within them to enhance readability. This can be improved by using more cohesive devices.
task achievement
Work on making your main points clearer and more comprehensive. Some ideas need more elaboration for better understanding.
coherence cohesion
Your essay maintains a logical flow, but some arguments could benefit from further support and elaboration. Ensure that each paragraph contains a single clear main idea and that all sentences contribute to that idea.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a logical structure and includes a clear introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
You appropriately addressed the task, discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of home education.
coherence cohesion
Your essay flows logically from one paragraph to the next, making it easy for the reader to follow.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: