IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The maps show the extension which took place at the seaside resort of Templeton from 1990 to 2005.

The maps show the extension which took place at the seaside resort of Templeton from 1990 to 2005.
The maps show the extension which took place at the seaside resort of Templeton from 1990 to 2005.
Overall
Linking Words
, a comparison of the two maps presents a modification from a rural area to a mostly urban area.
According to
Linking Words
 the maps,in 1990 seaside resort of Templeton was
natural
Correct article usage
a natural
show examples
,undeveloped
placewith
Correct your spelling
place with
 many trees,individual houses and public facilities
such
Linking Words
 as
Correct article usage
a hospital
show examples
hospital
Fix the agreement mistake
hospitals
show examples
,
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
 and railway
station
Fix the agreement mistake
stations
show examples
,but during the next 15
years
Add a comma
,years
show examples
 the town accomplished significant changes.
Firstly
Linking Words
,the most appreciable is that all the trees
cut
Add a missing verb
were cut
show examples
 down and a new airport was built on the right side of the river.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,the trees and houses located in the
south-east
Correct your spelling
southeast
show examples
 of the town were
also
Linking Words
 replaced by
Add an article
the factory
show examples
factory
Fix the agreement mistake
factories
show examples
. Another notable change was in the
south-west
Correct your spelling
southwest
show examples
 of the area,where a new big supermarket was built.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
,Also
show examples
 the houses were pulled down to make way for new apartment blocks.
Moreover
Linking Words
,there was a significant change from
railway
Add an article
the railway
a railway
show examples
station
Fix the agreement mistake
stations
show examples
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
coastline
Add an article
the coastline
show examples
.In 2005,using
ferry
Correct article usage
a ferry
show examples
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
helped to
transported
Change the verb
transport
show examples
 cars from west to east.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: