Crime is a big problem in the world; many believe that nothing can be done to prevent it. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give your own opinion

People
's opinion is different about whether
crime
can be prevented.
While
there are some strong arguments that the problem of
crime
is out of control.I still believe there are ways to prevent it. There are a number of reasons why
people
might argue that
crime
cannot be prevented.
first
Add a comma
,first
show examples
there is evidence that the number of criminals in the world is increasing and they try to commit many crimes
such
as robbery,
murder
Correct word choice
and murder
show examples
,... The kids will often be influenced by bad
people
and
then
follow
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
criminal
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
.Parents don't have time to teach them, so the
crime
rate among teenagers increases.The second is that some
people
have the right to take money from criminals and cover for them so some
criminal
Fix the agreement mistake
criminals
show examples
are no longer afraid of the law. In spite of the above
arguments
Add a comma
,arguments
show examples
I support the view that the problem of
crime
can be controlled. First of all, if families take the time to teach their children about the rules of the law, they will be aware. To solve
this
problem, families and schools have a great influence on children's
behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
show examples
and thoughts.
Secondly
, the government
also
needs to be responsible for strictly handling crimes
according to
regulations.
Increase
Wrong verb form
Increasing
show examples
penalties for dangerous crimes
such
as the death penalty will help reduce
crime
rates.
finally
Add a comma
,finally
show examples
get rid of governments that take money from criminals so that every violator is punished. In conclusion,
crime
control is quite difficult but I believe the ways to prevent them are effective
Submitted by anhnguhongmai on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: