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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Nowadays we see an increase in social problems involving teenagers. Many people believe that it is because parents spend more time at work and less with their children. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays more
people
Use synonyms
 think that to learn a second
language
Use synonyms
 well it is necessary to live
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the
country
Use synonyms
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
language
Use synonyms
 is spoken. Honestly, Not every
people
Use synonyms
 can move
country
Use synonyms
 where speakers live. It is
really
Correct article usage
a really
show examples
 helpful experience which
improve
Change the verb form
improves
show examples
 skills. On the one hand, moving have benefits, but on the other hand, there are drawbacks and
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 issue which be discussed and solved. In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
 both sides will be explained and supported with examples. First of all, learning
Use synonyms
language
Correct article usage
a language
show examples
 is a difficult process which
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
 every week studying something new. Honestly, if
person
Add an article
a person
the person
show examples
do
Change the verb form
does
show examples
 not can speak every week, he forgets
Use synonyms
language
Correct article usage
the language
show examples
 very fast.
Also
Linking Words
 studying
Use synonyms
language
Correct article usage
a language
show examples
 give a lot of benefits.
For instance
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, you can speak with
people
Use synonyms
other
Change preposition
from other
show examples
 countries
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due
Correct word choice
and due
show examples
 to
this
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 you learning other cultures,
understanding
Correct word choice
and understanding
show examples
tradition
Fix the agreement mistake
traditions
show examples
. And moving
country
Use synonyms
 can increase
this
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 effect.
Second,
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on the other
Linking Words
hand
Add a comma
,hand
show examples
 moving
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
Use synonyms
country
Add an article
a country
the country
show examples
 where that
language
Use synonyms
 is spoken
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 drawbacks.
For instance
Linking Words
, complicated in other
culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
show examples
. Unfortunately,
people
Use synonyms
 have problems with government and culture. They do not understand
law
Add an article
the law
show examples
 because do not
learning
Change the verb form
learn
show examples
 it.
Also
Linking Words
,
Add an article
a person
the person
show examples
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
 have
climatization
Correct article usage
a climatization
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 effect.
For example
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
difficult
Replace the word
difficulty
show examples
eat
Wrong verb form
eating
show examples
 and
drink
Wrong verb form
drinking
show examples
 because
them
Change the pronoun
their
show examples
body
Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
show examples
 do not accept
this
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.
To sum up
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, I want to say that
people
Use synonyms
 should move
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
Use synonyms
country
Add an article
a country
the country
show examples
 where live speakers
Use synonyms
language
Correct article usage
the language
show examples
. It
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 a lot of benefits, but it has drawbacks.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
,Also
show examples
 my opinion
that
Add a missing verb
is that
show examples
person
Correct article usage
a person
show examples
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
move
Fix the infinitive
to move
show examples
Change preposition
to other
show examples
other
Change the wording
another country
other countries
show examples
country
Use synonyms
 for learning new tradition, culture,
law
Correct word choice
and law
show examples
. And you can improve not only
host
Correct article usage
the host
show examples
 of peace yourself but
also
Linking Words
 you know yourself.

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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