You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#minutes #countries #money #poverty #aid

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There is no doubt that these days developed

nations

often send financial aid to

countries

that suffering from poverty, but all

this

kind of help doesn't solve poverty. The question is, whether rich

countries

should give different kinds of help to poor

nations

Change the punctuation

show examples

this

essay, I am going to discuss

this

statement and write my own opinion. In terms of view, helping needy

countries

with

money

solves a lot of issues. The main reason given to support

this

claim is that with a good financial

state

Add a comma

,state

show examples

countries

can develop many fields and it's positively reflected in their residents. To illustrate, developed the damaged education buildings and set a professional staff there and put a good salary for them.

In other words

, the education field is considered essential in a way to developing the country and improving every field that society needs it. With

money

Add an article

the money

show examples

the poor country can solve many problems that they face for a long time.

Moreover

besides

money

there are a lot of things can developed

countries

do to help poor

nations

Firstly

, send trained volunteers in many fields to

countries

that are in need.

In other words

, poor

countries

usually don't have the high quality of work and services as rich

nations

Secondly

, providing scholarships to young and talented with free workshops.

This

is because improving the education field in poor

nations

required a long time to

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

at a good level.

Also

, poor

countries

can't improve everything with their small opportunities.

Also

, rich

countries

can send good doctors and build good hospitals in poor areas. In conclusion,

although

financial aid is helping a lot

also

, poor

countries

need more than

money

Therefore

, I believe that developed

nations

should give other types of help to poor

countries

rather than financial aid.

Submitted by jqanber4 on Mon Apr 10 2023

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

295 words

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