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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think only parents are responsible for teaching children how to behave. Others think the main responsibility lies with schools and the government. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.

#people #parents #children #responsibility #schools #government #points
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no one can deny the importance of the parent's role in the youngster's lives,
as well as
 the importance of
schools
 that
people
 call the other home of the child with enough support from the government.
However
, I hold the belief that no matter how the
schools
 and regime are involved in the offspring's behaviour, it will not replace their parent's role. On one hand, some individuals claim that the mother and father of the child should be the only ones who are responsible for the kid's attitude. That because
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
youngsters always with their parents from the first day they were born,
in other words
, they are the most
people
 they spend time with ,so from that
perspective
Add a comma
,perspective
show examples
 they should be the only ones who are in response to teach their children how to behave probably, as those
people
 say.
On the other hand
, there are
people
 who say that
schools
 and government are the ones who should take care of the child's behaviour. And
that is
 because of their huge impact on the scion throw out their lives periods.
Moreover
, the youngsters spend half of their day in school so
that is
 why are the teachers there watching how the children are behaving with the government supporting them with the right places to study and putting rules to restrict any bad behaviour. On balance, there must be corporation between parents,
schools
 and the law without putting pressure on just one of them , so the children grow up with wonderful attitudes to their peers and to the society surrounding them.
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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