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Writing Samples
Band 6

recently, Australian children became fat. people claim it is schools responsibility to look after children health and exercise time. To what extent do you agree or disagree??

#australian #children #people #schools #responsibility #health #exercise #time
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It has been argued by many individuals that currently, the juveniles of Australia have more fat and human beings believe education institutes should be provided extra curriculum activities. I partially agree with
this
 given statement and
this
 essay will shed light upon my perspective in the subsequent paragraphs
along with
 a reasoned conclusion. Foremost, the fundamental cause behind my agreement is that schools might better control their students if they give sports to them in the centre of learning with the assistance of
this
 they would take part in games
such
 as cricket, football, hockey, kabaddi and many more without any argument as they give marks of learners behave of their good strength.
For instance
, a survey conducted by Harward University revealed that in India more than 300 hundred schools give more
opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities
show examples
 for physical tasks with
this
 the majority of children have fitted in their bodies because they perform the exercise in their daily routine. Paradoxically, the prominent ground behind my disagreement is that children spend more time with their parents than in school, so
that is
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 responsibility of them to look after their offsprings guardian have to make a schedule of exercise and study. Once they make a timetable of their daily routine, they will follow the plan and engage in physical activity with
this
 they may protect from obesity.
For example
, it is published an article by The Tribune newspaper showed that approximately 64% of young ones have shaped bodies because they participate in outdoor activities with the aid of their family members.
To conclude
,
although
 schools have the authority to take care of
tuttes
Correct your spelling
duties
tutees
 better, parents have more power
of
Change preposition
over
show examples
 good health.
Submitted by deepikanayyar1996 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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