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Advanced technology has brought many beneficial changes to the world. However, some old people today struggle with the use of technologies such as mobile phones and the Internet. How can the elderly benefit from using advanced technologies? How can the elderly be encouraged to use consumer electronics more often?

#technology #changes #world #people #struggle #technologies #phones #internet #benefit #consumer #electronics
Recently, the issue
has
Correct pronoun usage
that has
show examples
 been brought into focus
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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nowadays the development of technological
devices
 plays an important role in
this
 modern life. Some
people
 believe that old
people
 nowadays do not have knowledge about how to
use
 electronic. In my opinion, there are a large number of advantages for elder
people
by
Change preposition
to
show examples
 using these
devices
. In
this
 essay, I will outline two ways to encourage
olpd
Correct your spelling
old
people
using
Change the verb form
to use
show examples
 technology. One thing
that is
 of great significance is that we
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
live
Replace the word
life
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 in
development
Correct article usage
a development
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 period and
advances
Wrong verb form
advanced
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technology
Change preposition
in technology
show examples
 and it can make our life more convenient. There are many reasons for young
people
 should guide the elderly
how
Change preposition
on how
show examples
 to
use
devices
 like smartphones and tablets to purchase online or
buying
Wrong verb form
buy
show examples
 on credit. For one thing, young adults should set aside extra time to direct them because it
help
Change the verb form
helps
show examples
 the elder
people
 have the ability to maintain a balance between income and expenditure. The most familiar example of
this
 is in Viet Nam everything
are
Change the verb form
is
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become
Wrong verb form
becoming
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 more expensive and
people
 have to save money
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 costly purchasing.
In
addition
Add a comma
,addition
show examples
this
 will help the old one know the ways to
use
 money in a reasonable way. It seems quite clear that
teenager
Fix the agreement mistake
teenagers
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 should teach the elderly
use
Fix the infinitive
to use
show examples
 smart
devices
 and their life will be
Add an article
a change
the change
show examples
change
Wrong verb form
changed
show examples
 in a simple way. It is
also
 well-known that government should organize more
campaign
Fix the agreement mistake
campaigns
show examples
 to raise old’s
people
 awareness about the
convenient
Replace the word
convenience
show examples
 of the appearance of smart
devices
. The immediate result
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
produces is that authorities have to lead elder
people
 to
use
mobile
Add an article
a mobile
show examples
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
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 or other
devices
 to have more information
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 avoid health problems. A better example can be best provides is that in Viet Nam there are a significant number of diseases
such
 as heart attack,...
due to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
old age and it is helpful that elder
people
 can become as fit as a fiddle and stay in shape by looking for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
ways to keep a healthy body In summary, it is vital that old
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
 these days will have lots of benefits
in
Change preposition
from
show examples
 using technological
devices
.
Submitted by sinh.ielts on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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