Some children spend hours every day on smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
Many humans
use
smartphones every day. This
is because they need phones for many purposes such
as studying, gaming or Internet
, Correct article usage
the Internet
while
I think this
is a positive change because of convinience
.
Some Correct your spelling
convenience
children
use
smartphones. They spend their free time. Nowadays, with the unprecedented development of the internet
. Social media is the most common reason gaming
, online videos and other forms. Change preposition
for gaming
Then
some children
watch videos and play games. Other children
search profit
things. They learn a lot of online lessons. Replace the word
for profitable
In social
media has got online shops. If you want clothes, shoes and Change preposition
Social
accessory
. Many Fix the agreement mistake
accessories
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
use
smartphones for intagram
, YouTube and Correct your spelling
Instagram
other
. They post on Instagram or watch videos, chatting with friends. They show Fix the agreement mistake
others
of
their cars, houses and brand clothes. Nowadays humans earn Replace the word
off
money
in
social media. Change preposition
on
For
example
they earn Add a comma
example,
money
by using online stores or various sites. Nowadays you can earn more money
from Correct article usage
the internet
internet
but it is much better than Capitalize word
Internet
government
job. You can't be bored with the phone and the Add an article
a government
Internet
.
The down side
of using too much is that it hurts the eyes. And it brings other diseases. Correct your spelling
downside
For example
, in somnia
and headaches. Seeing rich Correct your spelling
insomnia
people
on the Internet
makes him bored with his life. Because Rich people
put all kinds of expensive cars and houses on their Instagram page. There are people
who spend more than half of the day on the phone.It is not good to use
more than the norm.
It is very great if the phone is used for a good purpose. Young people
are creating news on social networks. They are making a lot of money
without difficulty through social networks. Young children
are learning languages through the YouTube social networkSubmitted by omondavlat91 on
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introduction conclusion present
Provide a brief overview of the essay's main points in your introduction. This will give the reader a clear sense of direction.
logical structure
Ensure that each paragraph supports and develops a single main idea. Linking sentences too closely to unrelated points can reduce clarity.
logical structure
Improve paragraph transitions to help guide the reader through your argument more smoothly. Use linking phrases and words such as 'Moreover,' 'In addition,' and 'However.'
relevant specific examples
Provide more specific examples to support your points. For example, instead of vaguely mentioning that children use smartphones for studying, mention specific educational apps or programs they might use.
clear comprehensive ideas
The essay underscores the convenience and various functionalities of smartphones, which is a relevant and contemporary observation.
supported main points
The conclusion recognizes a balanced view by identifying both positive and negative aspects of smartphone usage, which shows a nuanced understanding of the issue.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.