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Writing Samples
Band 8

the graph below show the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

the graph below show the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.
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The line graph illustrates the number of
shops
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 in terms of closed and opened in one country over a period of 7 years. Looking from an
overall
Linking Words
 perspective, it is readily apparent that the statistic of
stores
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 that both closed and opened all saw a dramatic decrease between 2011 and 2018.
However
Linking Words
, the number of closed
stores
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 registered steep fluctuations. A deep analysis of the graph provided reveals that the
figure
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 for closed
shops
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 experienced fluctuations in the given period. In 2011, there were around 6300
stores
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 had to close. From
this
Linking Words
 year, the number of shop closures began to increase and reached its peak, at around 7000 in 2013.
By contrast
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
figure
Use synonyms
 started to fall sharply to approximately 700 in the next two years. After witnessing a harsh reduction, the statistic of closed
shops
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 saw a considerable climb to over 5000, and
then
Linking Words
 remained stable data in the next two years, at 5000 and over 5000 respectively. As for shop openings, it can be seen that there was a significant decrease over a 7-year period. In the year 2011, there were about 8500
shops
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 opened in that country, at which point
this
Linking Words
figure
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 started to fall sharply to 4000 in 2012.
This
Linking Words
 data started to rise roughly by 2000, at 6000
stores
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 in 2014, after which
this
Linking Words
figure
Use synonyms
 reduced notably to 3000 in 2018.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words shops, stores, figure with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "fall" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "fluctuations" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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