The personal information of many individuals is held by large internet companies and organizations. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? Thesis statement: Disadvantages outweigh advantages

#information #individuals #internet #companies #organizations #outweigh #thesis

Private data from many people

Change the verb form

are

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kept by big internet companies and organizations.

This

allows them to grant access to sensitive

information

such

as your personal name, your local address and your recent activities online, which helps you

filtering

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filter

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unwanted or unsuitable commercials online.

However

, failure to protect people's

information

may lead to privacy issues and damage the

companies

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company's

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reputation.

This

essay will discuss the pros and cons of

this

problem. Every website has something called "cookies". When you accept their "cookies", you allow that site to read your basic

information

, including your name, your location, nationality,

even

Correct word choice

and even

show examples

your previous search history.

This

is very essential especially

big

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for big

show examples

names like Google, Facebook, Youtube,

even

Correct word choice

and even

show examples

Bing

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apply

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because it lets them

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apply

show examples

display suitable advertisements to your personal preference,

Correct word choice

and prevent

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prevent

Wrong verb form

preventing

show examples

unwanted or annoying ads that may disturb you.

However

, if your data were improperly protected, it may lead to serious privacy problems. Your leaked

information

might be sold to anonymous hackers,

scammers

Correct word choice

and scammers

show examples

for

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

profit, and your safety is concerned. There was a time when Facebook - the biggest social media platform, was reported by users because their accounts

was

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were

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hacked, the reason for

this

because

Correct word choice

that

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the password linked to their account was stored in plain text, which data miners found out and exploited

this

fact to steal multiple accounts from different people. As the result, they have to pay a minimum of 2 billion dollars in damages. In my opinion, privacy should be the number one priority when it comes to individual info online, especially big internet companies as

this

affects their

userbase

Correct your spelling

user base

show examples

and the image of their company.

Submitted by huyentrang712 on Tue Apr 18 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

269 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The personal information of many individuals is held by large internet companies and organizations. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? Thesis statement: Disadvantages outweigh advantages

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that fittest and strongest individuals and the team can achieve success in sports, while others believe that success depends on mental attitude. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important for children’s development as other subjects, so they should be compulsory in high school. Do you agree or disagree?

The title "I had to show courage." Describe a circumstance where you had to exercise courage. What action of yours required a lot of bravery? Afterwards, did you feel proud of yourself? How did your surroundings respond?

Do you think that technological advancement has brought more harm than good? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?