Nowdays, more and more people decide to have children later in their life. Fo the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

In today's world، having
children
later in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people's life is a decision that they make more compared to the past. I think
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the benefits of
this
decision outweigh its drawbacks. On the one hand, having
children
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
older ages increase the risk of some illnesses. Women
decide
Correct pronoun usage
who decide
show examples
to expect a baby over
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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30 years old have more serious diseases
such
as heart attack and paralysis.
This
makes the lifespan of mothers and babies shorter, but the progress of science solves
this
problem. Another issue is
generation
Add an article
a generation
the generation
show examples
gap between
parents
and
children
. When
parents
and their
children
are from
different
Add an article
a different
show examples
generation
Fix the agreement mistake
generations
show examples
, they understand each other
difficulty
Fix the agreement mistake
difficulties
show examples
, and understanding between them goes down.
However
, there are many educational workshops that are used by
parents
and they can update themselves.
On the other hand
, older
parents
are more mature. As you become older, you make better decisions because you have more experience in comparison with the young. With more experience, we make
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
mistakes.
Moreover
, older
parents
succeed more in their jobs. So they earn more money and their high salary has a direct impact on their
children
's future. These
children
get a lot of
opportunity
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opportunities
show examples
for being more successful compared to other
children
because of their
parents'
Correct your spelling
parent's
show examples
money. I think, being
parents
Fix the agreement mistake
parent
show examples
is a significant responsibility for any human, and we must provide almost everything for someone
Change preposition
with that
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
whom
show examples
we decide to give birth. If you want to be great
parents
Fix the agreement mistake
parent
show examples
, your earnings must be high for updating yourself and supporting your child. In conclusion, nowadays, being
parents
in all the rages have a lot of advantages that outweigh
disadvantages
Correct article usage
the disadvantages
show examples
because of being met and earning more money. 277 words
Submitted by Maryamrajaeenia77 on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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