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Band 6

The chart below give information about the high-speed continuous internet connection of households in five countries in 2001 and 2002

The chart below give information about the high-speed continuous internet connection of households in five countries in 2001 and 2002
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The bar chart and the table show the high-speed
internet
Use synonyms
 connectivity of households in several countries in a 2-year period from 2001.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is readily apparent that,
while
Linking Words
 Britain experienced a dramatic change, South Korea showed a tiny fluctuation.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the
internet
Use synonyms
 connection in the USA had the highest figure in 2002
whereas
Linking Words
 Germany witnessed the lowest number. In 2001, South Korea had the most high-speed
internet
Use synonyms
-connected households, at 122 per 1000 individuals,
while
Linking Words
 the United States ranked second at 93
connections
Use synonyms
. High-speed
internet
Use synonyms
connections
Use synonyms
 were much less common for Britain, Switzerland and Germany at 3.3, 3.6 and 3.4 per 1000 people respectively. It can be clearly observed that the number of families with high-speed
connections
Use synonyms
 in the US climbed by 170% to 252.1
connections
Use synonyms
 per 1000 people, roughly double that of South Korea in the same year. Meanwhile, despite a change of 230%, only 10.89 per 1000 people in Britain had high-speed
internet
Use synonyms
 access by 2002.
In addition
Linking Words
, the figures for Germany and Switzerland were only 5.616 and 7.92 per 1000 individuals respectively.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words internet, connections with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "show" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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