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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The Chart below shows the results of a survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The Chart below shows the results of a survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The bar graph above illustrates the percentage of
coffee
Use synonyms
 buying, whether it is the fresh or
instant
Use synonyms
 type, including the consumption ratio of
coffee
Use synonyms
 and tea in cafes in five locations in Australia within the
last
Linking Words
 4 weeks. Namely Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Adelaide, and Hobart. The data for each survey object is varying in all five cities.
First,
Linking Words
when we look in general, the proportion of Australians that choose
coffee
Use synonyms
 shops is consistently higher than other observed events across five cities.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, the smallest percentage belongs to the category of people who purchase fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
.
Then
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, in the middle of them is the category for
instant
Use synonyms
coffee
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.
Secondly
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, when we analyse thoroughly, only Adelaine’s report isn't similar to the rest.
Instead
Linking Words
 of getting their
drinks
Use synonyms
 from
coffee
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 shops, making their own
drinks
Use synonyms
 is preferable for them, specifically
instant
Use synonyms
drinks
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.
However
Linking Words
, the gap between
this
Linking Words
 choice and the rest isn’t far away, only less than 5%. In conclusion, each resident of Australia has various preferences for types of
drinks
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. Namely, beverages from
coffee
Use synonyms
 shops, making
instant
Use synonyms
coffee
Use synonyms
 and brewing
coffee
Use synonyms
 beans.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words coffee, instant, drinks with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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