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Band 4.5

In many cities,many people are living in large apartments blocks.Does this accommodation have more advantages and disadvantages.

#cities #people #apartments #blocks #accommodation
Nowadays, a number of
people
 are living in huge
building's
Change noun form
buildings
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 flat and
this
Change the determiner
these
show examples
trends
Fix the agreement mistake
trend
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 are going to
contunie
Correct your spelling
continue
. In
this
 essay, I
wil
Correct your spelling
will
 argue
pros
Correct article usage
the pros
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 and cons of living
buildings
Change preposition
in buildings
show examples
. First of all,
i
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I
show examples
 want to explain some advantages
living
Change preposition
of living
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 in
apartmens
Correct your spelling
apartments
 and there have been immense advances
living
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in living
show examples
large
Change preposition
in large
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 apartments.
People
, who
living
Change the form of the verb
live
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 in
apartmets
Correct your spelling
apartments
 can easily do their housework
effordless
Correct your spelling
effortless
 even if
their
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there
show examples
 have some useful
facilitities
Correct your spelling
facilities
, and renting an apartment building is
Correct quantifier usage
more acceptable
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acceptable
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acceptably
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cheper
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cheaper
 than
own
Wrong verb form
owning
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 a house, and it
do
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does
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 not exist any real estate taxes.
Moreover
, I would mention that in these
establishment's
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establishment
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 utilities are much cheaper than a house.
Secondly
, there
also
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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a lot of disadvantages and
people
everyday
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every day
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 have been facing
this
 kind of
problems
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problem
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. One of them exactly must be
traffic
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a traffic
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jam
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jams
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 in many developing and developed countries, because it doesn't allow them
get
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to get
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 to their work
at
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on
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time
Add an article
the time
a time
show examples
. In
additionally
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addition
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, if we
living
Wrong verb form
live
show examples
 in
buldings
Correct your spelling
buildings
, there will have some noise
such
high
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as high
show examples
 music and crying child sound, laughing
people
.
As well as
 sometimes
people
 can not find any spare space
putting
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to put
show examples
 their
stuffs
Change the wording
stuff
kinds of stuff
pieces of stuff
show examples
 and
it's
Correct your spelling
its
show examples
reason
Add an article
the reason
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 is that
people
 prefer to live
small
Change preposition
in small
show examples
place
Fix the agreement mistake
places
show examples
 and it tent to create a new problem.
Furthermore
, the most major issue is parking and in
last
 times
this
Add a missing verb
has lead
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lead
Replace the word
led
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 to some
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
new
issue
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issues
show examples
 between neighbours. In
conclude
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conclusion
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,
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
 topic has lots of pros and cons and both of them are really essential and if we want to live in
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 apartment flat, we have to pay attention
where
Change preposition
to where
show examples
 we want to live.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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