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Writing Samples
Band 2

In many countries around the world young people decide to leave their parents’ homes once they finish school. They start living on their own or sharing a house with friends. Is this a positive or a negative development?

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First of all, I think young
people
Use synonyms
 who start living on their own or
share
Wrong verb form
sharing
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Use synonyms
room
Correct article usage
a room
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 with friends is a positive development which provides a huge benefit in exploring and facing hardships in the world. When young start living on their own or share a
room
Use synonyms
 it presents a picture that they have started their own journey and are now ready to be financially independent.
This
Linking Words
 creates a positive impact on the young
people
Use synonyms
's
mind
Fix the agreement mistake
minds
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 as they now face the struggles on their own,
makes
Wrong verb form
making
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 them mentally strong in terms of being financially independent
Linking Words
Moreover
Add a comma
,Moreover
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 young
people
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 should struggle
that
Change preposition
with that
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 comes along as it provides them with
long term
Add a hyphen
long-term
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 experiences. Sharing a
room
Use synonyms
 with roommates is
also
Linking Words
 a fun part. Sooner or later one has to move out in order to pursue higher studies so ultimately the development would be positive. At
Linking Words
last
Add a comma
,last
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 I would say that at the start it might be difficult to live alone or share
Use synonyms
room
Add an article
a room
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 but in the
end
Add a comma
,end
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 it would leave young
people
Use synonyms
 with some good experiences

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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