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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

It is important to ensure that children with a wide range of abilities and from a variety of social backgrounds mix with each other at school.

#children #range #abilities #variety #backgrounds #mix #school
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Nowadays, so many movements to support diversity include in
school
Use synonyms
. A wide range of abilities and various social backgrounds mixed with each other at
school
Use synonyms
 is important to our society. In my point of view, I agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement, and I will give the reasons for
this
Linking Words
. Social development is important for us as human beings. We come from many backgrounds,
such
Linking Words
 as religion, tribes and nationality. In
school
Use synonyms
, the
children
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 are prepared to be ready for the future, including how to socialize with other people in the real world. Various abilities show that they can be anything in their life.
For example
Linking Words
, they will have good communication and know how to adapt their self to a new environment.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, racism often happens
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 minorities, it will bring them to be victims of bullying, and it is not good for
children
Use synonyms
's mental health. For illustrate, if someone has a different
color
Change the spelling
colour
show examples
, she will get bullied and it will be a
long term
Add a hyphen
long-term
show examples
 trauma. In schools with different
background
Fix the agreement mistake
backgrounds
show examples
, the students learn how to respect other people by know their friends. I strongly agree that it is essential to make sure
children
Use synonyms
are mix
Change the verb form
are mixed
are mixing
show examples
 with each other because background is not important. The important is how the
children
Use synonyms
 know to respect each other and they know that they need other people to live.
For instance
Linking Words
, as a teacher working in a private
school
Use synonyms
 with many religions, we always care about each other; when someone
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 a big day like
christmas
Change the capitalization
Christmas
show examples
 or ied, we always  make some greeting cards for our friends and show that we are happy
of
Change preposition
with
show examples
 them.
Submitted by ieltscuns2022 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Promotes Inclusivity
  • Fosters Equality
  • Appreciate Diversity
  • Equitable Society
  • Broad Perspective
  • Problem-solving Skills
  • Real-World Diversity
  • Navigate
  • Global Society
  • Strive for Improvement
  • Unique Talents
  • Healthy Competitive Spirit
  • Reduce Social Inequality
  • Access to Resources
  • Empathy
  • Social Skills
  • Communication
  • Teamwork
  • Conflict Resolution
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