Nowadays a large amount of advertising is aimed at children. Some people think this can have negative effects on children and should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Over the
last
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decades, there have been immense
advanes
Correct your spelling
advances
in advertisement business and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
most of them have
attempt
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attempted
show examples
to get
children
Use synonyms
's attention. It is
blieved
Correct your spelling
believed
by some that it has
influenced
Add a missing verb
been influenced
show examples
negatively to them by
advertisement
Replace the word
advertising
show examples
companies.
However
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, each coin has two sides. In
this
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essey
Correct your spelling
essay
, I will explain why it should not be let them announce
products
Use synonyms
in front of them. First of all, in
modern
Add an article
the modern
show examples
world,
advertisement
Replace the word
advertising
show examples
companies's
Remove the s
companies'
show examples
goals
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
obvios
Correct your spelling
obvious
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
which have been
choosing
Wrong verb form
chosen
show examples
to get
children
Use synonyms
's attention easily. It is clearly
seem
Correct your spelling
seen
show examples
that
children
Use synonyms
have been affected in a wrong way by
this
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kind of company.
For
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example
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,example
show examples
when they are going to
store
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the store
show examples
specially
to
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for
show examples
Use synonyms
children
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children's
show examples
toy side, there are placed lots of
products
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such
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as
car
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cars
show examples
,
doll
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dolls
show examples
and other interesting stuff. These
sort
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sorts
show examples
of
products
Use synonyms
specially and logically
have
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apply
show examples
located
in
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on
show examples
Youtube
channel
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channels
show examples
when they are watching their movie or any type of
cartoons
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cartoon
show examples
they are easily look at them,
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then
Correct word choice
and then
show examples
of course they are going to require to buy
it
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them
show examples
. In
this
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situation, parents
really
Add a missing verb
are really
show examples
fed up
all
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with all
show examples
advertisements. Some researches show that a number of
parent
Change to a plural noun
parents
show examples
proceed to have complained
all
Change preposition
about all
show examples
these companies.
Secondly
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, in my point of view, it
also
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has a lot of useful sides which are so imperative.
For instance
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, many of them use advertisements perfectly in a good term where they have declared in journals or
in
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on
show examples
the internet in order to buy new books and new student
equipments
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equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
show examples
as well as
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they introduce their
tecnological
Correct your spelling
technological
products
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that in
this
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day and age, many
student
Change to a plural noun
students
show examples
use
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
plenty of tablets at school.
To conclude
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, it illustrates that advertising has
also
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a positive
affect
Correct your spelling
effect
show examples
besides
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a negative effect,
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however
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,however
show examples
it is going to impact in a wrong way when lots of people tend to buy all
stuffs
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stuff
kinds of stuff
pieces of stuff
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
their
children
Use synonyms
.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Targeted advertising
  • Psychological development
  • Artificial needs
  • Unhealthy eating habits
  • Materialism
  • Consumerism
  • Parental responsibility
  • Critical thinking
  • Informative content
  • Economic implications
  • Revenue generation
  • Content creation
What to do next:
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