Attending a live performance (for example, a play, concert, or sporting event) is more enjoyable than watching the same event on television. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There is a controversial perspective heating
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
debate that watching a performance at home is not as interesting as joining the
live
one. From my viewpoint, I would consider myself a relative proponent of
this
idea to some extent. Without a shadow of a doubt, when we directly watch a show in real life, it is more fascinating than watching through a
television
.
This
might be because a
live
show has
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
good quality and is more crowded than a
television
version.
For instance
, when
people
go to a concert, they probably have chances to interact with singers and enjoy a quality speaker system, which they may not experience on
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
television
.
Moreover
, the atmosphere in a concert is more vibrant
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
pushes the feeling of
people
to the highest level.
Hence
, a
live
performance is more intriguing than watching it on
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
television
.
While
the interest
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
a
liveshow
Correct your spelling
live show
is widely acknowledged, watching
through
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
television
is comparatively enjoyable in some aspects. And the explanation for
this
could be that there are some shows that are hard to watch clearly
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
live
. To be more specific, it is difficult for
people
to watch a football match in a stadium if they sit in the
last
row.
However
,
people
can watch it in detail on a
television
through a flood of cameras.
Therefore
, watching
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
television
also
is a good choice in some situations. In conclusion, watching a
live
performance is more exciting than that show on
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
television
in some
Submitted by hominhtrang995 on

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task achievement
Ensure you write a complete essay, including a strong closing argument or summary in your conclusion to fully address the topic.
coherence cohesion
Consider using a wider range of cohesive devices and transition words to enhance the flow between ideas and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Introduce each main point more clearly and dedicate a full paragraph to exploring that point, providing a balance between both sides of the argument.
task achievement
To improve the task achievement score, make sure that your essay fully addresses the prompt by discussing the extent of your agreement or disagreement more thoroughly.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • immersive experience
  • replicated
  • energy
  • atmosphere
  • sense of community
  • shared excitement
  • unforgettable
  • predictable
  • convenience
  • comfort
  • crowds
  • travel
  • multiple camera angles
  • close-ups
  • replays
  • enhancing
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