New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#technologies #children #time

this

cutting edge , everyone likes to

use

electronic

gadgets

due to

new technologies the way offspring spend their free

time

is changed.

According to

my opinion, the pros of using electronic

gadgets

clearly outweigh their advantages.

This

essay will discuss both pros and cons of

this

occurrence in the subsequent paragraphs. There are some fruitful outcomes of using new technology by

children

in order to spend their free

time

. The predominant one is that

children

should not go anywhere for doing any activity for spending their free

time

as they can play on mobile phones or they can

use

any other electronic gadget on which they could play several games by which they can get enjoyment . It would be fruitful especially for their parents as they would not worry about child if their

children

stay at their home .A survey conducted by the USA demonstrated that 63% of pupils liked to

use

electronic

gadgets

while

sitting at their homes and they are safe at their homes.

However

, it has numerous repercussions which are crucial to be considered.

Firstly

, if pupils

use

more smartphones

then

they could not be able to live healthy lifestyles. They could be prone to various health problems if they like to spend their free

time

by using technology not by doing outdoor activities. Without performing physical activities they cannot stay healthy , so it is crucial for

children

to do more outdoor activities in order to live healthy lifestyles.

secondly

, they could decrease their eye vision if they prefer to

use

gadgets

. It could not be fruitful for their eye health . they could face numerous problems

while

doing a study if their eye vision decreases. Ergo, it could lead to various health problems so

children

ought to

use

fewer electronic

gadgets

for spending their leisure

time

. In conclusion,

although

using more new technology by

children

for lavishing their free

time

has few merits, it has many drawbacks which cannot be overlooked

Submitted by MANJOT on Thu Apr 27 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

334 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Digital literacy
Cyberbullying
Sedentary lifestyle
Inappropriate content
Self-learning
Screen time
Social inequality
Enhanced communication
Creative expression
Educational resources

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New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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