Nowadays children watch much more television than they did in the past and spend less time being active or creative. What is the reason for this? What measures should be taken to encourage children to be more active?

#children #television #time #reason #measures

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These days, many

kids

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spend a lot of

time

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watching

television

Use synonyms

compared to the past.

Moreover

Linking Words

, they are not familiar with doing outdoor

activities

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or exercises. I will discuss why

this

Linking Words

is happening and suggest what solutions should be taken to encourage

children

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to go out in order to do a lot of

activities

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. The main cause of

this

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phenomenon is that nowadays, a majority of

parents

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work hard. So, they do not have enough

time

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to take care of their

kids

Use synonyms

at home. Since they

spend

Verb problem

have

show examples

hectic

Correct article usage

a hectic

show examples

life, they usually feel exhausted after working and just let their

children

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watch

television

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instead

Linking Words

of doing

activities

Use synonyms

together. It eventually leads

children

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to watch

television

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all the

time

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in the household. In a survey conducted by Seoul National University, 65% of

parents

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who have

kids

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responded that they allow

children

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to watch

television

Use synonyms

at home for over 3 hours because of their work and tiredness.

This

Linking Words

means that

children

Use synonyms

do not have a chance to work out or do

activities

Use synonyms

with their

parents

Use synonyms

Finally

Linking Words

, It makes

kids

Use synonyms

spend their

time

Use synonyms

watching

television

Use synonyms

However

Linking Words

, there are solutions to rectify

this

Linking Words

problem. One of the ways to deal with

this

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issue is that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

governments can establish a

child-care

Use synonyms

system like an After-School in modern society. If

children

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go there, they can make new friends and do numerous

activities

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such

Linking Words

as playing instruments, doing sports, and even dancing. From my experience, when I was young since my

parents

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were extremely busy, they did not have

time

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to do

activities

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with me.

Nevertheless

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, I could do plenty of

activities

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with my friends in the After-School. In South Korea, we had well-maintained

child-care

Use synonyms

systems. So, my

parents

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could take me to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

school.

This

Linking Words

indicates that if the governments set up

child-care

Use synonyms

systems, it will help

parents

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Verb problem

apply

show examples

take their

kids

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and play an important role in developing

children

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activities

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To sum up

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, it is true that a lot of

children

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just stay home and watch TV shows because of their busy

parents

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However

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this

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problem can be resolved by establishing

child-care

Use synonyms

systems in our society.

Submitted by lym1049 on Thu Apr 27 2023

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction
Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
7
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

1 paragraphs

351 words

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Nowadays children watch much more television than they did in the past and spend less time being active or creative. What is the reason for this? What measures should be taken to encourage children to be more active?

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

In many countries today, if people want to find work, they have to move away from their friends and their families. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Many people try to achieve success through their career or education. What can success mean to different people? What is your view of success?

many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities. does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organization. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?