Nowadays children watch much more television than they did in the past and spend less time being active or creative. What is the reason for this? What measures should be taken to encourage children to be more active?

These days, many
kids
spend a lot of
time
watching
television
compared to the past.
Moreover
, they are not familiar with doing outdoor
activities
or exercises. I will discuss why
this
is happening and suggest what solutions should be taken to encourage
children
to go out in order to do a lot of
activities
. The main cause of
this
phenomenon is that nowadays, a majority of
parents
work hard. So, they do not have enough
time
to take care of their
kids
at home. Since they
spend
Verb problem
have
show examples
hectic
Correct article usage
a hectic
show examples
life, they usually feel exhausted after working and just let their
children
watch
television
instead
of doing
activities
together. It eventually leads
children
to watch
television
all the
time
in the household. In a survey conducted by Seoul National University, 65% of
parents
who have
kids
responded that they allow
children
to watch
television
at home for over 3 hours because of their work and tiredness.
This
means that
children
do not have a chance to work out or do
activities
with their
parents
.
Finally
, It makes
kids
spend their
time
watching
television
.
However
, there are solutions to rectify
this
problem. One of the ways to deal with
this
issue is that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
governments can establish a
child-care
system like an After-School in modern society. If
children
go there, they can make new friends and do numerous
activities
such
as playing instruments, doing sports, and even dancing. From my experience, when I was young since my
parents
were extremely busy, they did not have
time
to do
activities
with me.
Nevertheless
, I could do plenty of
activities
with my friends in the After-School. In South Korea, we had well-maintained
child-care
systems. So, my
parents
could take me to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
school.
This
indicates that if the governments set up
child-care
systems, it will help
parents
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
take their
kids
and play an important role in developing
children
's
activities
.
To sum up
, it is true that a lot of
children
just stay home and watch TV shows because of their busy
parents
.
However
,
this
problem can be resolved by establishing
child-care
systems in our society.
Submitted by lym1049 on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

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A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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