IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some experts say for road safety cyclists should pass a test before being allowed on public roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#experts #road #safety #cyclists #test #roads
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In
this
Linking Words
 modern era, people use a variety of transportation
such
Linking Words
 as automobiles, trains, motorcycles, bicycles etc. Some commentators perceive that the bicycler should
give
Verb problem
take
show examples
 a test before being permitted on public roads because of road safety. I will throw some light on
this
Linking Words
 notion. I will support my stand with pertinent arguments in upcoming paragraphs and
thus
Linking Words
 will lead to a logical conclusion at
last
Linking Words
. To
initiate
Verb problem
begin
show examples
 with, there is decrement in bicyclists and more usage of fuel vehicles so global warming is increasing day by day. From an environmental perspective,
this
Linking Words
 move is not beneficial. Apart from that, as per the people, the government can apply that rule that's why some of them who ride
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
bicycle
Fix the agreement mistake
bicycles
show examples
 will shrink because the authority should not apply the unimportant rule.
In addition
Linking Words
 to that, the cabinet should focus on another facility which is transportation and they should increase it so bicycler is able to commute easily and quickly.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the government should apply rules for stunt men who do stunt with a cycle on public roads against them they should take action.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, The main reason behind there is more chances of an accident. For a compatible example, a few masses can not able to ride bicycles so they can't
give
Verb problem
take
show examples
 the test they don't have a licence and are not allowed to drive cycle on public roads
therefore
Linking Words
 there is less chance of an accident. To recapitulate, I will pen down by saying that,
as a result
Linking Words
 of applying the mandatory rule of gaining a licence some of the people who drive the bicycle will shrink.
Submitted by gauravkalathiya123 on

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task response
The essay strays from the task topic and lacks development of ideas. It needs to stay focused on the given topic and support the arguments with relevant examples.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is weak. The introduction and conclusion are vague and do not effectively present the arguments and the essay lacks cohesion. The essay should follow a logical structure and maintain cohesion throughout.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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